As bad as cast of characters were in act one, their black cards don’t necessarily need to be revoked–at least not permanently. Act two though? These 50 coons for the most part are coons that black people need to collectively shun for good barring a 180 degree about face from whatever the infraction(s) was that landed them in such dubious company.
Coontestant# 49 Cam Newton
Based on his offense to blackness in 2016 Cam actually belongs in the first group of redeemable coons. Cam is setting off the coon for life team via extrapolation. In 2015 Cam embraced being a strong and proudblack man, much to the chagrin of the Carolina fan base and of course team ownership. So what did they do? They decided to bring in GOP spin doctor and race bait extraordinaire Frank Luntz to be the quarterbacks coach on navigating conversations on social issues and race, and boy was Cam a quick study.
At the rate of change that Luntz’s tutelage had on Cam, if he remains the QB’s race coach for much longer Cam will indeed become the second coming of Sammy Sosa–and much closer to the number one spot in the next year. Here’s hoping that Cam listens to more sounds of blackness in 2017 and less Frank Luntz.
Coontestants 48-46 Alicia D White, Caesar R Goodson and William Porter
While these three coons did not directly kill Freddie Gray, they grossly abdicated their civic responsibilities, their blackness and their sheer humanity to protect the blue shield. They were charged along with the three white officers who were actually the ones that mortally wounded Gray in an attempt to get to the truth. In the end the the well intended tactic failed. Largely because of these three coward ass coons.
With the cooperation of the aforementioned three coons, all of the charges stemming from Freddie Gray’s murder were dropped on all six suspects.
Coontestant# 45 Baltimore Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake
After prosecutor Marilyn Mosby took the courageous and unprecedented step of casting a wide net to prosecute the murder of a citizen by the police her mayor threw her under the bus by claiming that she (Mosby) was bowing to political pressure as opposed to trying to solve a murder perpetrated by the state. She also insinuated that Mosby was not ready for the big stage, and when her city cops instigated a “riot”, instead of empathizing with the young black youth that were being antagonized by her city police officers she publicly called the kids thugs. Rawlings-Blake was and remains solidly on the side of the Baltimore Police Department despite the fact that the Justice department revealed systemic abuses. She is yet another black face put in a high place to protect white supremacy and maintain the status quo.
Coontestants #44-39 (washed up former athletes for Trump) Mike Tyson, Latrell Sprewell, Terrell Owens Shawn Merriman and Floyd Mayweather
It greatly pains me to put a former main man (Mike Tyson) on this list, but gotta go gotta go. When your allegiance to a purveyor of such overt bigotry and racism is stronger than your allegiance to your people you have out lived your worth to the community.
Coontestant# 38 Katrina Pierson
This bubble headed broad was Donald Chrumps national spokeswoman during his campaign and as ridiculous and juvenile as his little twitter fingers are, hers were worse. So much so that she did not even get a White House job after all the cooning that she did to help get him elected. She’s made more appearances on milk cartons in the mid-west than she has on cable news since Trump was elected.
Coontestant# 37 Malik Obama
This coon from another continent and half brother of President Barack Obama was hired by Donald Chrump to be a prop at his last debate verse Hillary Clinton. He pulled off the trifecta with that coon move. He sold out African-Americans, his family name and the entire continent of Africa.
Coontestamt#36 Armstrong Williams
Armstrong Williams has been cooning since before Tookie Williams was banging. This OG coon has been pushing the white supremacist agenda for so long that I almost for got that he rode the coon train. The television host, business partner and bff of Dr. Ben Carson had an up and down year himself. While his media empire continues to grow and he remains one of the most successful black men in media ownership his penchant for sexually harassing males continue to haunt him…
I wonder what his bff Ben Carson who is anti-gay to the extreme feels about his homies predisposition for getting butt massages by men.
Coontestant#35 Stacy Dash
Stacy Dash aside from being a certified coon for life is a glutton for punishment and addicted to the game of rotisserie roast-me on twitter. She started 2016 out on the wrong foot by decrying the inherent racism of the Image Awards, BET and even going so far as to say that Black History month needed to be abolished. Her timing was impeccable because a week after she made the comments the NAACP image awards came and she was roasted by host Anthony Anderson who said
“Everybody give a round of applause for Stacey Dash…What the hell is she doing here? Doesn’t she know that the Fox network is using her? She’s just an Ann Coulter dipped in butterscotch. That’s all she is. Baby, don’t let them use you! …Come back to the black people and get back to work on some of those beautiful C-movies that you used to do!” ~ Anthony Anderson
And of course Black Twitter had to get a piece of the action
While Twitter had a ball with her coonified faux pas in 2016 unfortunately there will be less opportunities to lampoon her lunacy because Fox News declined to extend her contract for 2017. All that cooning she did and still got dropped. I wonder if BET is hiring???
Coontestants 34-25 Allen West, Jesse Lee Patterson , Herman Cain, Larry Elder, Niger Innis, Raven Symone, Pastor David Manning , Charles Payne and Bob Johnson
These ten consummate coons did not do or say anything of note in 2016. At least nothing more noteworthy than what we have all come to expect from them but what’s a coon list without adding them. The marvel is the fact that none of these handkerchief heads cracked the top 10 or even 20 this year.
Coontestant #24 Lesean “Shady” McCoy
If he needs help, he’ll call the cops ~ Shady McCoy on Colin Kapernicks protest
Coontestant#23 Steve Perry
For most of this dudes career in public life and as a “school reformer” he’s flown far under the radar coondar. It makes him one of the more dangerous coons in America, specifically because his end goal is the destruction of the public school system and the teaching profession-particularly those in black communities. One of the few silver linings in Donald Chrump becoming the president is the fact that the insidious and dastardly deeds as they pertain to his work with school reform overtly dovetails with the plans that the new president has for inner city schools and he is rightly starting to be called out for it and it’s getting harder and harder for him to conceal his true motives.
Coontestant# 22 Lee Daniels
This dude has been speaking reckless for sometime now. His quizzical reasoning for why he cast a white star is as befuddling as it is bemusing.
We would be remiss not to add this guy to the list. With Obama leaving office and Justice he’s the most powerful black man in the nation. And with those powers he votes lock step with the avowed racists in the US senate. From repealing voter rights and protections to removing the social safety net for the most needy this dude is as “ain’t shit” as they come.
Coontestants# 20-19 Diamond & Silk
This is what happens when rats and raccoons crossbred. These two Ratcoons better known as Diamond and Silk are the human equivalent of a Fox News merger with BET. If Azelia Banks and Carlton Banks ever had twins Diamond & Silk is who they’d grow up to be like. These hood possums are a viral minstrel show and are unabashed about it.
Coontestant# 18 Jason Whitlock
Jason Whitlock is another long time coon who has a fairly broad media perch for which he uses to spread his cooned out opines.
Jason Whitlock on Black lives matter:African-Americans are more likely to be struck by lightning than to be killed by police
Jason Whitlock on Colin Kapernicks protest: “This kid was about Instagram models, tattoos, his abs and building up the Colin Kaepernick brand — until the very moment he loses his starting quarterback job, and now he’s out here and he’s ‘Martin Luther Cornrow.’ And he’s got cornrows, he’s Allen Iverson, he’s Angela Davis. I don’t buy it
It’s rather obvious that he hates the black skin that he was born in. It’s unfortunate that he is given such a wide ranging perch on television, radio and print media to misinform the masses while codifying the white supremacist construct.
Coontestant#17 Justice Clarence Thomas
Now that Justice Scalaia is dancing with the devil until the end of eternity and unable to stick his hand up this clowns ass to play puppet master, he’s a rudderless coon on the bench less able to fuck over the country and black people by extension. He still however is one of the most destructive coons to black progression of all time so his falling out of the top ten has much less to do with him doing less cooning in 2016 and much more to do with the the uptick in competition coonpetition for that number one spot.
Coontestant#16 Kanye West
Kanye has been on a collision course with coonery for a while now. And while his fragile mental state is cause for more empathy and understanding than scorn and rebuke we’ed be remiss to omit him from making the top 20 list for 2016. With love of course.
Coontestant# 15 Officer Brentley Vinson
The man on the left is Keith Lamont Scott. Someone who was minding his business reading a book in his car while waiting to pick his kid up from school. The coon on the right is Brently Vinson, the Charlotte officer that murdered him for no reason at all. And while I do think that it’s possible a black man joinging a racist police force such as Charlotte could lead to him becoming a coon, something tells me that Vinson was a coon long before he received his badge. He’s a graduate of Liberty University. What Black man goes there that is not already a coon?
Coontestant# 14 Sgt. Demetrick Pennie
This coon with a badge just wanted to make his name known as a proud member of the Procyon species of mammal. Why else would he bring forth such a frivolous suit? This is what you call “how to get on Fox news 101”. i should not even be giving him the attention but how can he not make this list? This coon is being used as a pawn in a law suit not only naming Black Lives Matter, but also President Obama, Hillary Clinton, and Al Sharpton. This coon is literally throwing his feces at the wall with hopes that is sticks.
Coontestant# 13 Howard Croft
Howard Croft served as the City of Flints director of public works from 2011 until he was forced to resign in 2015. His position oversaw the flint water distribution system. It was him that brought the recommended changes that had the then city emergency manager Ed Kurtz switch the cities water source to the Flint River. He along with Kurtz has been indicted and is facing up to 20 years. Luckily he has the face of a snitch and all indications are he is doing just that as his previous counsel dropped him for meeting with investigators alone and rumors that the governor Rick Snyder too will soon face indictment. Stay tuned…
Coontestant #12 Darnell Earley
Darnell Earley is one of the emergency managers that the governor hand picked to run many of the cities in the state of Michigan. Even before the Flint water crisis that he helped cultivate and cover up he was a certified coon because he was used as a tool to usurp the sovereignty and franchise of the black people of the cities that he was appointed. He basically helped render their votes impotent because no matter who the citizens of Benton Harbor, Flint or Detroit elected, he and the other emergency managers were placed in charge of their city. He eventually replaced Ed Kurtz as city manager of Flint during their ill-fated switch to the Flint river for the cities water supply. Despite knowing that poisons from that river was literally making the citizens of the city sick to death. He too is facing indictment. He even had the audacity to try and stick the cash strapped city of Flint with the bill for his $750 per hour lawyer.
Coontestant#11 Pastor Mark Burns
This extra mediocre fuck boy is your typical witless and talent-less tool. A coon of his stature normally would not make it so close to the top 10 even in a non-vintage year. He makes it this high on the list for the sheer audaciousness of his cooning ways. After cooning his way into a speaking gig at the GOP convention it all came crashing down when his bio was discovered to have been replete with alternative facts. He stated that he was a member of Kappa Alpha Psi fraternity that was a lie, he said that he was in the Army reserve, and that too was proven to be untrue. His being enrolled in a masters of divinity program also was a figment of his imagination. He was confronted with all of these stretches of the truth on camera in a sit down interview with CNN. It was so bad for the coon that he tried to go off the record mid interview and when that did not work homeboy walked out of the interview leaving the CNN correspondent all by his lonesome in his 400 square foot church. In the end Massa Trump took him off the coon circuit and his ass ain’t been seen since.
Top 10 coons of 2016
Coontestant# 10 Pastor Darryl Scott
Pastor Darryl Scott is the lead vocalist in the Black Preachers for Trump crew.
In fact Darryl Scott is the Michael to Pastor Burns Tito in so far as what they mean to the BPFT movement.
So far he has not been able to parlay his pulpit cooning into a steady job with the administration so for now he has to settle for being the right hand coon to Donald’s right hand coon.
Coontestant# 9 Lil Wayne
Wayne actually looks like the physical manifestation of a rat and raccoon encounter during mating season. His music has long been of the minstrel type. However as demeaning and degrading as his music has been over the last couple of decades he managed to make occasional dalliances with the reality faced by many of his fans that made him the mega rap star that he is. That’s why is answers to some very basic questions into his level of black consciousness left so many bemused.
Lil Wayne on Colin Kapernicks protest:
“I’m not into it enough to even give an opinion. Somebody had to tell me why he was doing it. That’s how much I didn’t know what was going on, and I kinda still don’t. Somebody gotta explain to me like, ‘Yo, he kneeling because of Black Lives Matter thing and because’—that whole wave just went by me too fast for me to give an opinion.”
Lil Wayne on racism:
“These 33 years have been nothing but a blessing,” Wayne said on the show. “I have never—never’s a strong word. I have never, never dealt with racism and I’m glad I didn’t have to.” Tunechi added that he didn’t know if being a star made him immune to racism, but he now knows racism does exist despite racism not being his reality, continuing, “I would have to say I thought it was over. I still believe it’s over, but, obviously it isn’t.”
Lil Wayne after black twitter got wind of his coonery:
Coontestant# 8 Jim Brown
Jim’s late breaking 2016 coonery caught a lot of people by surprise but I can’t say that I am one of those folks. Jim has a reputation for being down for the historic causes on behalf of the black community but the truth us Jim has always been out for Jim.
This famous photo of Jim Brown and other great black athletes in their prime years during the 1960’s showing their unconditional and public support is something of an urban legend. Jim Brown is rightly credited with putting the group together, but the stated goal of this meeting of the minds has been obfuscated over the years. This meeting of hall of fame minds was the brainchild of boxing promoter Bob Arum. He tasked Jim Brown with gathering the group to convince Muhammad Ali to enlist in the Army so that his ban from boxing would be rescinded and they could all profit from the burgeoning closed circuit pay per view industry. It just so happened that Ali was game enough for all of them and would not hear any of it. In the end these “well meaning” gentlemen & Jim settled for this iconic photo op.
Which brings us to his most recent photo op in the tale end of 2016. The one where Trump and his loyal brown minions sent him on the now familiar walk of shame through the Trump Towers lobby to deliver this barf inducing quip:
“I fell in love with him because he really talks about helping African-American, black people and that’s why I’m here” ~~ Jim Brown on Donald Trump
# 7 Don King
About the only mantra more annoying than Don Kings “Only in America” chant is Don Trumps “Make America great again” so the natural synergy between the two Dons should surprise no one. What I did find just a little bit surprising is the level of minstrel that Mr.King stooped to while introducing him:
“You’ve got to understand, my black brothers and sisters, they told me, ‘You’ve got to try to emulate and imitate the white man and then you can be successful… So we tried that. They said, ‘If you can get some money, you can do this here.’ I told Michael Jackson, I said if you’re poor, you’re a poor negro – I would use the N-word – but if you’re a rich, you’re a rich negro; if you are intelligent, you’re an intellectual negro; if you’re a dancing and sliding and gliding nigger – I mean negro – you’re a dancing and sliding and gliding negro. So dare not alienate because you cannot assimilate. You know, you’re going to be a negro till you die.”
Coontestant #6 Sherrif David Clarke
Milwaukee sheriff David Clarke is one black man that has never met a shooting of an unarmed black man by a law enforcement officer that he did agree with. David Duke has more genuine love for black people than this afro goatee having nincompoop. In addition to being one of Fox News most prized props for misinformation he oversees as sheriff one of the deadliest jails in the country and for that he has legislators in his state asking that he be removed.
Coontestant# 5 Shaqcoon O’Neal
Shaq shot up the coon charts in 2016. His penchant for always paying homage to the police and being an honorary sheriff has always been a turn off but not enough to place him so high on the coon list or even on it at all. That was of course until her decided it prudent to give his incoherent and coonish opine on Colin Kapernick’s anthem protest on Fox & Friends of all places…
“To each his own…I don’t really have a say on it, but I would never do that. My father was a military man, and you know, he protected this country. Uncles are in law enforcement, you know, they go out and work hard every day..People like Muhammad Ali and Bill Russell, they were one way their whole career. You can’t show us something, and then go to another just because of certain issues”~ Shaq
What makes Shaq’s commentary so egregiously coonish is the fact that he’s part of the .001 percent of Black Americans. Unlike most of the coons that routinley grind our gears he’s far from being a mediocre negro. He literally hit the DNA lottery with his god given physique. He has zero reasons to be cooning and even less reasons to be sitting on the couch with the lame cast of Fox & Friends giving an opine on issues that require depth of understanding and nuanced thought. Big duffus has a PHD yet he let three stoogers from Fox News walk him into talking himself out of his black card.
Coontestant#4 Charles Barkley
Shaq’s partner in coon has much more experience in the area of catering to the angst ridden ego of white males so his offenses to black people and black culture is far less shocking. For him to out rank so many other certified coons he would however have to coon harder than he did in years past. Never one to back down from a challenge Barkley with the help of TNT put on a classical coon performance.
TNT has a 6 part series airing early in 2017 titled “The Race Card” which is a discussion around the hot-button issues that cause and comprise the strained racial relations in today’s America and they tapped Charles Barkley of all people to host the program. They might as well have named it “TNT Trolls Black America” because that is essentially what happened on the first stop of Coon conductor Charles. The first stop was in Baltimore Maryland and it came on the heels of a justice department report that highlighted systemic abuses of the residents of Baltimore at the hands of Baltimore City police. Charles however did not want to talk about that. He instead chastised the audience for not expressing condolences for 4 officers that were killed earlier in the week in other parts of the country. Needless to say that did not go very well. He ended up having to be ushered out by security because they were big mad.
Coontestant # 3 Ben Carson
Dr. Ben Carson is the only coon on the Trump train that was able to engineer for himself a a cabinet position. Being a renowned brain surgeon one would think that naturally he’s be tapped to be the surgeon general. Not in Trumps White House. Carson was instead tapped to head up the department of housing and urban development, something he has next to no clue about. Other than the fact that he’s black and hails from the inner city he is qualified to run HUD in Trumpian thought. Why? Because when they gut the agency render it totally useless they will be able to point to their black token as the cause to shield them from claims of racism.
Coontestant# 2 Ray Lewis
17 years ago Ray Lewis while partying at the Super Bowl in Atlanta with his boys got into some sort of conflict with two men who were both subsequently stabbed to death. Both of the victims blood made it’s way into Ray’s limo and the all white suit that his bama ass was wearing on that cold January day vanished from the face of the earth. Now I’m not calling Ray Lewis and murderer but that is what he was charged with and there was far more evidence linking him to the murders of Jacinth Baker and Richard Lollar than there was evidence linking OJ Simpson to the murders of Ron Goldman and Nicole Brown. Despite the damning evidence and in the case of his Easter Sunday suit the lack there of Ray was acquitted of all charges. By the court or law and by the court of ubiquitous negro opinion. To most of white America however he was still a thug unworthy of playing in the NFL. So he went from Ray Lewis the typical bad boy from the University of Miami to Creflo Dollar Jr with the extra preachy super annoying disposition. Yet and still most from the Negro delegation even still. That obviously did not ingratiate himself enough with white America because in more recent years he’s incorporated some serious respectability negro politics into his spiel.
He started with making a bunch of lame videos appealing to the youth of Baltimore to behave and not riot in the face of police abuse then slowly but surely went full blown coon on us with several appearances on The Undisputed hosted by fellow coon Jason Whitlock where they formed the greatest black tag team duo since Rocky Johnson and Tony Atlas manned the squared circle. The Colin Kapernick story gave this tag team duo all kinds of coon life but that was just a warm up for Ray Ray. He too took the infamous walk of shame photo op at Trump Towers. But unlike Kanye, Jim Brown and Steve Harvey Ray looked like he was quite conformable in that setting.
Coon of the Year: Omarosa
This she devil right here is the most dangerous and despicable black woman in America–the world even. She’s Kelly-Ann Conway with melanin and a functioning brain. She’s #blackgirlrocks minus a conscious.
This cold calculating shrew is Donald Trumps bottom bitch and director of African-American coon outreach for his administration. She’s the cunning concubine of the slave master… .
…but don’t mistake her for Ernestine.
She’s much closer to the type of concubine that you’d find on the Candy land Plantation. You know the type that can’t live without master.
The truly unfortunate thing about her is the fact that she is smart, highly ambitious and talented. She knows more than the average coon and even more than the man that pays her a hansom ransom to corral and create more coons. She’s gonna make coons out of a lot of men these next four years. I pray that in the next few years she does not morph into some sort of role model for the young black, melaninated and impressionable young girls coming up. It’s bad enough that we have an avalanche of black men bending over backwards and forwards to appease the white male supremacist ethos that infects America. The last thing we need is a role model for young black girls to think it prudent to do the same. So while there’s no denying her drive and black girl magic, the fact that she uses her powers for evil purposes we’re going to have to shelve celebrating her achievements during the month of February.
As we say goodbye to the greatest for good we should also say goodbye for good to the term GOAT (save for conversations about Ali). Muhammad Ali embodied the term and it’s less than respectful to his legacy to bestow such a hollowed moniker on any other athlete or entertainer–especially those who have done little outside of their master craft to measure up to what the champ did outside of his day job. So in honor of the GOAT’s passing here are five (of many) reasons why no one should ever be refereed to as the greatest of all time ever again…
1. He created the term
On February 25, 1964 after the artist formally known as Cassius Clay stopped the heavily favored Sonny Liston in seven rounds he took to ring center and proclaimed that he was the greatest and that he shook up the world. Little did anyone know that this young brash 22 year old was not just smack talking and would go on to embody both the term “I Am the greatest” and the act of shaking up a world in need of shaking. Ali through the years had trials and tribulations that put to test his greatness and at every turn he would remind friend and foe alike that he was indeed the greatest of all time. You will be hard pressed to find an utterance of that verbatim prior to Ali saying so. Therefore he’s the standard bearer of what the GOAT should look, sound and act like.
2. His convictions were not compromised by public opinion, monetary gain or even peer pressure from his contemporaries
Muhammad Ali’s refusal to be drafted into the Army during the Vietnam war and the revocation of his title for it is well chronicled. One of the more poignant photos from that period of his life is the one where he is surrounded by some of his contemporary greats including Bill Russell, Jim Brown and Lew Alcinder. The misconception is that they were there to support Ali and his defiant stance against the war. The truth is they were actually there to do the opposite. The private meeting was to convince him to enlist and to assure him that he would not be going to war but instead would serve as an ambassador to it and a morale booster to the troops in much the same way that Joe Louis was used during World War II. Ali who was far less educated than all of the men in attendance (in a formal sense) had a rebuttal for each and every point they brought up. He went on an almost two hour filibuster going into great detail why he would not be supporting the Vietnam war or enlisting. He won over the well meaning yet naive greats and forced them to reexamine their tacit support of the war. So much so that Lew Alcindor followed the path of Cassius Clay and retired his slave name a couple years later.
3. Ali Spoke truth to power instead of seceding to the powers that be.
There has never been an athlete before or since Muhammad Ali that has had the courage to speak truth to power. He did not shrink, bow or take a back seat to white supremacy. He confronted the white supremacist construct with as much confidence and zeal as he confronted his opponents in the ring. His defiant stance in media gave a nation (within a larger more hostile nation) of millions courage and pride. It inspired protest and affirmed the fact that we as a people are great. He was not worried about endorsement dollars. In fact he knew that it would be more lucrative for him to go along to get along just as pretty much every athlete today does but he remained steadfast and fearless.
4. He was not trans-racial and did not transcend race. He was unapologetically Black.
Jackie Robinson, Joe Louis, and Jesse Owens were phenomenal athletes that paved the way for Muhammad and others to thrive in the sports arena. By extension they paved the way for black people to more equitably integrate in to all levels of sports, entertainment, business and academia because they humanized blacks in the minds of millions of white Americans that saw (and treated us) as less than. Jackie, Joe, and Jesse were not a black mans black man though. At least not publicly. They were the white mans black men and while I completely understand the precarious line that they had to walk they lacked the intestinal fortitude of Muhammad Ali who made the conscious decision to be the black mans black man. Before him on the national sports scene there was none and sadly no such an athlete has come after him. Muhammad Ali’s embrace of his blackness was so real and so authentic that white people loved and respected him for it (the ones that did not hate him for it).
Michael Jordan is widely considered the GOAT in basketballcentric conversations. However he was as bad off the court about being a strong black man that took strong black stances as he was good at dominating the league over the span of his playing career. Michael Jordan was arguably a greater basketball player on the court than Ali was a boxer in the ring but his sheer cowardice as it pertained being a black mans black man exempts him from legitimately holding the GOAT title. Micheal Jordan was famously asked in 1990 to endorse a black man running for the US Senate by the name of Harvey Gantt. Gantt at the time was trying to unseat one of the most rabidly racist and regressive US Senators since reconstruction by the name of Jesse Helms (NC). Michael Jordan’s response to the endorsement request was “Republicans buy sneakers too”. MJ was the closest athlete to reaching the world wide recognition as Ali. Black America could have really used from MJ in the 80’s and 90’s the kind of unapologetic blackness that Ali gave to black America during his prime. He chose to do the opposite therefore he’s much closer to being a goat than the GOAT.
5. He is the father of rap music and by extension the hip-hop culture
DJ Kool Herc is the father of hip-hop. Muhammad Ali however is the father of rap. The only thing missing from the punch lines, similes and analogies inherent in his prophetic and poetic proclamations were bars and hooks. The precocious and braggadocios rhymes that Ali spit was primordial hip-hop. In fact it was hip-hop (LL Cool Jay) that actually coined the acronym GOAT. And while LL is not the GOAT he is Ali. Jay Z is Ali, Ice Cube is Ali. Scar Face is Ali.Biggie was Ali, Tupac was Ali. Fuck being like Mike, Be like Ali. The one and ONLY GOAT.
The NBA trade deadline came and left last week with little to no hoopla, fanfare, or late breaking news of any kind of three team swap changing the predictable balance of power in either conference. It’s been something of a downer for us fans of the game that like just a little bit of drama to go with our hoops. However, in lieu of Kevin Love not becoming a Celtic, Laker or Clipper; despite Carmelo having a no trade clause in his contract and irrespective of the fact that Dwight Howard & James Harden are married at the hip for at least the remainder of the season there still were some really block busting trades consummated at the 11th hour of last weeks NBA’s trade deadline. The NBA NRA (National Racial Association) quietly announced four huge trades.
The Fine Print
The NBA collective bargaining agreement states that in every trade the two parties being traded must be within 125% of each other salary wise. Since the NRA does not track the salaries of those on the trading block the formula that they use to remain in compliance with the collective bargaining agreement are the professions (or lack there of) of their trade prospects. So for an example if I was the sole arbiter of what was and was not a fair trade I would gladly trade Dr. Ben Carson for the Puppy Monkey Baby. Only problem with that is the fact that Dr. Ben Carson is a world renowned neurosurgeon and the Puppy Monkey baby a prop from a Super Bowl commercial. The Puppy Monkey Baby maybe a bit more cogent and capable of carrying on an adult conversation but it’s hardly enough to compete with a guy that has on his resume the separation of Siamese twins conjoined by the noggin-even if that guy is a certified loon. So it goes without saying that such a trade would not be approved by the Association. So much to the chagrin of the Black delegation Dr. Carson will remain a part of the black community for the foreseeable future. The good news for the black delegation however is they did find trading partners for four other blacks that have long been considered to overstayed their welcome in the community and in need of having their respective black cards revoked. I’m certain that most would agree with the following deals that were most recently agreed upon before the trade deadline.
NRA Trade Number One: Stacy Dash for Gary Owens
You don’t have to be the GM of the Lakers or Celtics or be the next coming of Jerry West for this deal to have been your brain child. This particular trade comes straight out of No Brainerville. Two B-C rated actors that are already comfortable in the others skin (figuratively and literally) and seamlessly able to traverse cultures and code switch their way right up into the family. Stacy Dash went from being a video vixen extraordinaire serving as eye candy to inner city generation X’ers with hip-hop proclivities to Fox News’s resident coonologist and eye candy for angry white ammo-sexual baby boomers. She’s been on the trading block since at least 2012at least 2012. Her decision to resurrect her faint relevance as one of the resident Fox News Coontributors specifically hired to assuage the guilt and placate the fragile feelings of the Networks Salty white Tear dripping viewership. Just did not sit well with the home team. The straw that broke the camels back though was her latest viral diatribe after being invited on the Fox & Freinds to opine on the #oscarssowhite controversy
STEVE DOOCY: What do you think about this?
STACEY DASH: I think it’s ludicrous.
STEVE DOOCY: Why??
STACEY DASH: We have to make up our minds. Either we want to have segregation or integration. And if we don’t want segregation, then we need to get rid of channels like BET and the BET Awards and the Image Awards where you’re only awarded if you’re black. If it were the other way around, we would be up in arms. It’s a double standard.
STEVE DOOCY (HOST): So you say there shouldn’t be a BET channel?
DASH: No, I don’t think so. No. Just like there shouldn’t be a Black History Month. You know? We’re Americans. Period. That’s it.
DOOCY: Are you saying there shouldn’t be a Black History Month because there isn’t a white history month?
DASH: Exactly. Exactly.
She could not be any more clearer about want g out off of Team Blackness with that mindless missive. Not since Latrell Spreewell choked PJ Carlisimo in practice way back in 1997 has a player been so undisguised about wanting to be traded.
For Gary’s part he celebrated being traded to the black community just as you would expect a black person to do. He took to the Gram…
Welcome to the fam G!
NRA Trade Number Two:Jason Whitlock for Dave Zirin
With such a huge dearth in black journalism and the black perspective being bantered in the ether to compete with and combat mainstream media bias and mind manipulation it’s a shame that we have to put one of the more successful and widely read and regarded black sports writers on the market. But when the opinions you posit present more poison to the problematic nature of post Fairness Doctrine specious and pernicious journalism as opposed to being an elixir to such a societal malady then you really have worn out your welcome and need to cease being a Journalist in Black Face. We are better off with you being on another team because a black face postulating white supremacist thoughts and codifying the inexplicable angst of a large swath of AmeriKKKa is actually worse than it is coming from your typical AM side of the dial angry white talk show host. . As a sports writer Jason Whitlock has been largely able to fly under the radar as it pertains to offering an opinion on the germane issues of the day. But on those rare occasions that he’s asked or tasked with taking on issues of equality, intersectionality, and/or oppression nine times out of ten he’s going to offer a convoluted quip that Ted Nugent would be proud to re-tweet.
Dave Zirin on the other hand has long used his pen as a sword for social justice and equality. Not just for black people but all oppressed, neglected and disaffected people around the globe. He’s penned several books that delve deep into the heart of the pertinent issues of the day from a high minded and holistic perspective. The John Carlos Story and Game Over are just two of the many books that he’s authored that I recommend as a great reads…
More recently these two contemporary sports writers had the prime opportunity to opine on the same issue tackling intersectionality in a sports related kind of way and their opinions could not have been any more divergent. By now everyone is aware of Beyonce’s Super Bowl Performance where homage was paid to The Black Panther Party, victims of police brutality and mis-conduct as well as the LGBT community. The overall message was one that was about love and they went to great lengths to say as much.
…that obviously was not universally interpreted and understood and our latest trading partners could not have crystallized any better how differently the message in the music of the Super Bowl Half-Time show has been conveyed.
Jason Whitlock on Beyonce’s performance:
Beyonce, why are you bringing this rebellion to a sporting event? This is an event that all of America comes together, 100 million people around America and throw Super Bowl parties, we come together across economic and racial lines and it’s all just one good time and the players … represent all these great things in America. … Probably not appropriate for the Super Bowl. It’s just not that type of event.
If you want to send a message, if you want to pander to social media and Twitter, if you want to extend your brand by involving yourself in controversy, [then] what Beyonce did was absolutely brilliant. You listen to the song’s lyrics, there’s no real rebellion in it. None.
“So I can see how the NFL got fooled by this. They listened to the song, and there’s nothing to it. There’s no tribute to the Black Panther party or any real shots at Hurricane Katrina or anything like that in the actual lyrics of the song. You have to watch the video to get the rebellion. She didn’t release the video until the day before the Super Bowl. So I could see how the NFL got caught off-guard.
When you tie the whole thing together, Beyonce snuck in some subversiveness that has put her in the center of controversy and has enhance her and Jay-Z’s brand. They had been getting beaten up in social media by the Black Lives Matter movement, that ‘You don’t support us,’ ‘You’re not down with this movement,’ blah blah blah . . . Beyonce pulls off this publicity stunt and now she’s all good with the social-media crowd and the people involved with Black Lives Matters.
“It’s all just a game and a fun marketing tool for Beyonce. They’ll make more money out of this and enhance their brand. But they’ve also set off some divisiveness in America, and that’s what’s disappointing to me.” ~ Jason Whitlock
A whole hell of a lot of people on Fox News and in the right-wing sewers of the Internet have lost their damn minds. I am not going to link to the statements, ranging from the historically ignorant to the unabashedly racist, because that’s their game. But I will say that if you are comparing the Black Panthers to the KKK, like one police sergeant did on Facebook, you are only proving that the extent of your historical knowledge is what some asshole said on Twitter. It’s like “comparing Adolf Hitler to Richard Pryor because they both had mustaches.”
Yet despite the right-wing noise, Beyoncé’s performance has created space for a real conversation about the Black Panthers, beyond the caricature. It is a chance to get people to see the recent Stanley Nelson PBS documentaryVanguard of the Revolution or read The Black Panthers Speak or Seize The Time or any number of books. Just to give one example, the most illustrative, politically textured Panther memoir in my humble opinion is My People Are Rising by Seattle Black Panther Party founder Aaron Dixon. When Dixon’s book was released in 2012, I pushed people to read it on social media and among friends and was met with a tepid response. After Beyoncé’s performance, I went back and recommended it again. The reaction was off the chain.
Being in the Bay Area this week has also opened my eyes to another part of what made Beyoncé’s halftime performance matter. There are people here who have dedicated their lives to fighting police brutality—most recently in the form of the killing of Mario Woods—and for the rights of the homeless to not be treated like collateral damage of gentrification. They wanted the Super Bowl to be an opportunity to spotlight these issues for the country. Instead, they were met with a smothering police presence, indifferent media, and an NFL occupation that made swaths of their city resemble the Green Zone in Iraq. ~ Dave Zirin
It’s pretty clear from reading the thoughts of these two sports journalist that hearing more of the latter and less (a whole lot less) of the former would be sort of a good thing.
NRA Trade Number Three:Darnell Earley for Tim Wise
Most people don’t know who Darnell Earley is but I’m certain that they know his work. Darnell Earley is the Emergency City Manager that was put in place by Governor Rick Snyder to run the city of Flint. There’s really not much else to say about this son of a bitch ass coon. He played a major part in poisoning the drinking water of an entire city full of lower middle class, poor black, brown and white people. He was then promoted to head the Detroit Public Schools to put the final nails on that coffin before his previous dastardly deeds came back to haunt him and he was forced to resign due to the mess that he co-created in Flint. He was essentially a black face hired to push a white supremacist agenda and he did a stellar job at it.
Tim Wise on the other hand has been one of the more formidable and unabashed white voices against racism and prejudice in American society for the last 10 years. He’s nothing short of an ally in the fight against white supremacy so this one again was pretty much a no brainer.
NRA Trade number four:The Congressional Black Caucus for the Congressional Progressive Caucus
The CBC’s recent endorsement of Hillary for the democratic nomination over the much more progressive (and trustworthy) Bernie Sanders was rather disappointing. It however was not enough of a reason to put the CBC who has long been known as the conscience of the Congress on the trading block . The unconscionable and inexplicable reasons that the leadership gave for their endorsement is actually why they have been offered up for the kinder, gentler and much more socially aware Congressional Progressive Caucus. It’s hard to begrudge Congressmen John Lewis and Congressman James Clyburn for endorsing a person who has helped their PERSONAL ambitions in maintaining their congressional seats by allowing some of the unmitigated and untraceable big money that flows through their coffers to trickle into their own respective campaign war chests. However when they conflate someone being able to help them personally with actually doing the same for the black community, the masses the have supported them for the last 40 years have every right to take umbrage with their reckless word choice on their already questionable endorsement.
Now don’t get me wrong. Someone simply doing what was right in 1963 or whatever year it was that Bernie Sanders marched for equality or was arrested at a sit in does not automatically earn the black vote in 2016. However dismissing his involvement in the Civil Rights movement because you are supporting someone was on the opposite end of the historical and ongoing fight for justice is rather dubious.Take for instance John Lewis’s response to a reporter asking him about Bernie Sanders well documented dalliance with the Civil Rights movement during his college years:
Well, to be very frank, I’m going to cut you off, but I never saw him, I never met him. I’m a chairman of the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee for three years, from 1963 to 1966. I was involved in the sit-ins, the freedom rides, the March on Washington, the march from Selma to Montgomery, and directed their voter education project for six years. But I met Hillary Clinton. I met President Clinton.”~ Congressman John Lewis
Lets parse that statement real quick. He is implying one of two things both of which are nonsensical.
A: he’s either implying that he knew Hillary and Bill from being supporters of Civil Rights some 50 years ago.
He’s implying that he’s never in his life met Bernie Sanders. Both statements are patently false. His statement was a conflation of facts. When you have to resort to that kind of double speak to justify endorsing a person then you deserve all the back lash that comes your way (as it did) to force you to eat your errant word play (which he did). Quite naturally he took a lot of criticism from corners of the political and social movement world that are in most cases reticent when it comes to critiquing elders from the civil rights time period. Predictably he was compelled to walk back his aggressive response to the innocuous query:
I was responding to a reporter’s question who asked me to assess Sen. Sanders’ civil rights record. I said that when I was leading and was at the center of pivotal actions within the Civil Rights Movement, I did not meet Sen. Bernie Sanders at any time. The fact that I did not meet him in the movement does not mean I doubted that Sen. Sanders participated in the Civil Rights Movement, neither was I attempting to disparage his activism. Thousands sacrificed in the 1960s whose names we will never know, and I have always given honor to their contribution…If you take a look at a transcript of my statement, you will find I did not say that I met Hillary and Bill Clinton when I was chairman of SNCC in the 1960s. My point was that when I was doing the work of civil rights, led the Voter Education Project and organized voter registration in the South in the 1970s, I did cross paths with Hillary and Bill Clinton in the field. They were working in politics, and Bill Clinton became attorney general of Arkansas in the 1970s as well. That began a relationship with them that has lasted until today~ John Lewis (mea culpa)
The double speak did not end there. Both he and congressman Clyburn both denounced the idea of free college. They said that such a thing sends the wrong message. Here are two men particularly in the case of John Lewis that purport to carry the torch of Dr. Martin Luther King and his fight for economic equality sounding like Paul Ryan when it comes to evening the playing field in a most fundamental way. It was only 8 years ago that Clyburn was denouncing the race baiting of Bill and Hillary in their nomination fight against Obama. Now he can’t stop extolling her virtues. Collegiality over conviction is what that amounts to. It’s certainly not egregious enough of an offense for an individual trade so both John Lewis, James Clyburn and every other member of the CBC (not named Mia Love or Tim Scott) are all on Team Blackness for life but as an organization in congress boasting the teams color and logo it’s time that we trade them in for a more forward leaning body in the House and Senate. Even before the CBC bet their black card on Hillary Clinton they have been slowly but surely losing their way and subsequently the right to be called the Conscience of the Congress. Just to illustrate a few of their more incorrigible misdeeds as a caucus the following list serves as exhibit A.
In 2014 Rep Alan Grayson (of the Congressional Progressive Caucus) introduced a Bill to put an end to the Pentagon siphoning their military grade weapons and equipment off to America’s already overzealous police forces. The measure failed and only 7 of 41 members of the CBC voted to for it.
They have in increasing numbers started to capitulate to the Wall Streets demands on regulating their blood sucking hood predators like Pay Day Loan and Rent-to-Own companies
In 2008 the CBC Foundation which had raised over $55 million dollars from 2004-2008 spent more on a lavish banquet for ($700,000) than they did in scholarships that they awarded.
Again. As individuals the CBC members have little to worry about as far as being traded but as a collective the Black Delegation can do much better so…
3. A racist term that whites used to disparage and humiliate blacks
4.A modern day term ascribed to black people who purposely and overtly disrespect other black people (and black culture) for the express purpose of ingratiating themselves with white conservatives for monetary gain, societal perks or simple pats on the head.
5.Black people who affirm, uphold, support or in anyway agree with the white supremacist construct in America and abroad
example: Steve Harvey (honorable mention) is channeling his inner coon by offering up the black youth that his organization mentors as pawns in Paula Deens public relations re-branding scheme.
Now calling a black man a coon is highly offensive. It’s damn near fighting words. So in the interest of fairness and intellectual honesty all of the forthcoming nominees for the 2014 Captain Coon crown will be accompanied by at least one full context verbatim so that they can convey in their own words how and why they made it to the top ten percentile of such a dubious category. Without further ado I present to you the top ten coons of today (from least to greatest).
10. Don Lemon
Now if you compare Don Lemon to some of the coons that will follow him on this list you will find that his slights to the African-American community at the behest of ingratiation with the dominant Caucasian population is rather innocuous. In fact compared to some of Don Lemon’s fellow Coon Conductor nominees he’s H Rap Brown. Although Don’s offenses towards the culture are not as egregious, constant or overt as most that will make this list, as a black man with a national media profile and platform he too often is guilty of lazy thinking and political expediency when discussing matters germane to the interest and survival of African-Americans.
Bill O’Reilly famously went on a rant berating black culture with the express purpose of changing the national dialogue from racial profiling, unequal protection under the law for blacks and Zimmerman getting away with murdering Trayvon Martin to black people being cultural pariahs.
Don responded to this ridiculously racist rant by saying “He’s got a point. In fact, he’s got more than a point. In my estimation, he doesn’t go far enough.”
Even though he knew this was the aim all along (to change the conversation) he helped Bill O’Reilly do it and then had teh audacity to have an issue with those that took umbrage to his coonsign.
9. Stephen A Smith
Like Don Lemon the level of coonery that Stephen A Smith displays on a daily basis pales in comparison to the coonery practiced by the rest of this list but his coon credentials are far too authentic to ignore. Mr. Smith got himself in deep hot water with many in the black community for his co-sign and subsequent doubling down of Marc Cubans bigoted comments. Many were shocked but I was not. Stephen A Smith boarded the coon train way back in 2009 while making a cameo appearance on conservative talk show hosts Mark Levin’s radio show.
In a not so clever set up Mark Levin lobbed a soft ball question about the new black president and the job that he was doing to Stephen A Smith and in classic coon conditioning Mr.Smith hit it out of the park for a grand coon home run. Now criticizing the first black president does not in and of itself make one a coon–there’s plenty of legitimate things to criticize this president about. However criticizing the first black president for doing the right thing and using half baked conservative talking points makes you a certified coon.
Mark Levin: “What do you make of what’s going on today, with all of the government push and all racism charges and the rest of that stuff?”
Stephen A Smith: Well I’m disturbed to be quite honest with you… I’m very very disturbed. You know as an African American growing up in the streets of New York City I understand what poverty is all about… I understand what trials and tribulations mean but at the same time I’m looking at what we are witnessing from our president, a man I voted for, a man that I was proud to vote for at the time simply because from a historical perspective what he represented and then I’m looking at what I consider to be a government take over.And I’m quite alarmed and I don’t think he campaigned on it. I know that his record was radical. I listen to Sean Hannity a lot and Sean makes it a point to say that every day but I certainly did not expect us to own 80 percent of AIG, I did not expect us to own part of the automobile industry…It’s one thing to put forth a 787 billion dollar stimulus package, but to drop on top of that a 410 billion omnibus package, a 3.6 trillion budget, a Cap and Trade bill and then to come with a universal healthcare that ultimately lends toward a government take over of the healthcare system. I did not have to listen to Mark Levin, or Sean Hannity or Rush Limbaugh to recognize that this is something that should make all of us extremely uncomfortable because as a young black man growing up in the streets of New York City, no matter what you say about so many of the critics that were perceived as leaders within the community– people may have advocated for government intervention in terms of supervising things and making sure that we were all operating under a fair and equitable system but I don’t recall anybody–and I mean anybody that has ever walked into the black community and advocated a government take over of anything. It’s about handling your own business, grabbing yourself by your own bootstrap and lifting yourself up. We may all need assistance but a take over is an entirely different situation all together. I’m extremely uncomfortable with this and even more uncomfortable with the fact that race has become a part of the discussion. We all know racism exists to some degree but to act as it is as prevalent as it was years and decades ago is completely untrue and it serves to divide this nation which I thing is a catastrophic thing.
Mark Levin: Are you running for president because I’d vote for you!
It almost seems like he should be higher on the list huh?
8. Michael Steele
When the conservative clarion call went out for a black face to provide cover for the rampant racism that the Tea Party and the rest of the GOP establishment was about to unleash on America, Michael Steele was the loudest and proudest voice to step to the plate. Micheal Steele lobbied , ran ,shucked jived and cooned for the job of chairman of the Republican National Committee. He narrowly beat out another coon (Ken Blackwell)for the job. He beat Ken Coon Blackwell largely on the promise that he would be able to deliver the hip-hop vote to the GOP (he really said that). His exact words were that “the GOP needs a hip-hop make-over”. It became the biggest running joke of his short tenure as RNC chair. He was heavily lampooned for it…
…and even the president got in on the act.
And just like Coon Steele can’t tell the difference between laughing with folks or when folks are laughing at him. But his true coon showed when sat in the hot seat with none other than coon number 10 (Don Lemon) and unwittingly revealed what most observers already knew–that him being the first black chairman of the RNC was a direct response to the country electing it’s first black president. What’s even more astounding is the fact that he believed at the time that they were on equal footing.
At the end of the day, and moreover at the end of Steels’s very short stint as a leader of the fledgling republican party his appointment was a failure–For both the party and himself. The GOP still has a black problem and Micheal Steele lost pretty much all of his political stock and capital. It’s so bad for that guy that he can’t even get a job working for the defacto communications arm of the GOP (Fox News). Instead he has to settle for being the conservative whipping boy on left leaning cable news outlets.
7. Herman Cain
I’ve long been of the belief that conservative blacks (aka coons) were talent-less, witless, slow thinking extra mediocre individuals and no person in recent memory embodied that caricature as fittingly as Herman Cain did when his black face and calcified mind briefly became the front runner in the 2012 GOP primary race. His reign at the top of the loser leader board was ephemeral but the coontastic memories that he gave the world while leading in GOP nominees for that brief stint are priceless…
…from his penchant for pinching white women’s asses unsolicited to his viral classic brain freeze the dude was well worth the price of admission to this minstrel act. He is certainly one of the more entertaining coons to make the list.
6. Stacy Dash
Stacy resurrected her name from obscurity during the 2012 elections by taking to Twitter of all places to declare her support of the almost human Mitt Romney. In predictable fashion the Twitter back lash from Black Twitter was fast and furious. Months later she ends up getting a job as a Fox News contributor. Pretty clever for a clueless chick.
From clueless to cooning. Only in Merica!
5. Rev Jesse Lee Patterson
No caption needed…
4. Allan West
The quote in the meme says it all. If that’s not enough to convince you of this clowns coonery I’m just gonna drop this here for your enjoyment
3. Larry Elder
Like Allen West Larry Allen’s internal angst as it pertains to the black race that he was so unfortunately born into comes from a very deep place. It’s almost like he’s made at black people because he’s black. He unlike even Allen West who was able to parlay his forced military retirement into a one term congressional appointment has no discernible skill set or even end goal. He’s just cooning for the sake of being a coon. And a pretty damn angry one at that.
Now you know you cooning on another level when regular white folks–not even particularly altruistic ones are calling you out and questioning your absurd worldview.
2. Dr. Ben Carson
Dr. Carson is one of the more unfortunate additions to this list. Blessed with gifted hands but saddled with a graceless mind. Dr. Carson is a classic example of book smarts not transferring to other areas of personal endeavor. This high ranking coon actually said before a white conservative audience that the Affordable Care Act was the worst thing since slavery.
1. Clarence Thomas
This King Coon is perhaps the most insidious black force to ever oppose black people n America. His detriment to the African-American collective quest for equality is as unrivaled as it is unforgivable.
Uncle Thomas’s hit job on black america started long before George Bush Sr. tapped him to replace Thurgood Marshall on the Supreme Court Ronald Reagan tapped him to Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) where he purposely buried claims to prevent blacks and other minorities from seeking redress from employment discrimination.
Now Justice Clarence Thomas in addition to being known as an Uncle Tom purest is know to be deftly silent on and off of the bench. It’s hard to get a succinct, in context verbatim from him to prove his coonhood so instead I will simply list his great contributions to white supremacy and towards raising the misery index for black Americans by way of his voting decision making on the bench.
Clarence Thomas’s on Civil Rights
Affirmative action forever discounts black achievements. (Oct 2007)
Analyzed and advocated unpopular positions on race. (Oct 2007)
Black problems should be solved by blacks. (Oct 2007)
Preferential policies should apply to disadvantaged whites. (Oct 2007)
Affirmative action has stigmatizing effects. (Oct 2007)
Questions “adverse impact”: blacks can catch up with whites. (Oct 2007)
Black problems should be solved by blacks. (Oct 2007)
Improve black lives, consistent with conservative values. (Oct 2007)
Censure Bob Jones University for interracial dating ban. (Oct 2007)
EEOC had difficulty enforcing equal opportunity laws. (Oct 2007)
Coloradans entitled to be hostile toward homosexual conduct. (Aug 2005)
Don’t recognize GLBT as a constitutionally-protected class. (Dec 2003)
Limit employer liability for sexual harassment by employees. (Jun 1998)
Employee must prove negligence to sue city for harassment. (Jun 1998)
Tension between affirmative help and undermining dignity. (Sep 1991)
Reaching out to minorities is OK; but no quotas. (Sep 1991)
Supports scholarships & internships for minorities & women. (Sep 1991)
Sodomy laws are uncommonly silly but states can enforce them. (Jun 2003)
Sociological analysis insufficient to prove gender bias. (Jun 2011)
State laws should not protect gay rights. (May 1996)
Hate crimes must be separate crimes, not just for sentencing. (Jun 2000)
Miranda rights can be overruled by Congress. (Jun 2000)
Boy Scouts may exclude gay scoutmasters. (Jun 2000)
This truncated list does not even contain his most insidious decision to join justices Roberts, Scalia, Alito and Kennedy to roll back the key provisions in the 1965 voting rights act making it harder for blacks to vote and easier for racist states to deny blacks and other minorities access to the polls. Unlike the rest of the loud mouth coons that made this list Uncle Thomas puts his money where his mouth is. as a matter of fact he rarely uses his mouth. He’s been a silent assassin when it comes to killing the hopes and dreams of black America.
Congratulations Uncle Thomas! You are the 2014 Coon Conductor.
This week (5/19) Malcolm X would have turned 89 years old. Unlike on Martin Luther Kings birthday my timeline was not flooded with timeless quotes from the birthday icon despite being one of the more poignant orators of not only his era, but the 20th century. I rhetorically ask why?
When we think of the Civil Rights period and the forces behind the dramatic and dynamic societal paradigm shifts that took place we often think of and credit Martin Luther King and the mostly pacifist, Gandhi inspired peaceful resistance movement as the impetus responsible for much of that change–and rightfully so.
We however tend to forget and under-appreciate the role played by Malcolm and the movements that he joined and inspired. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not feeding into the false dichotomy of Malcolm vs Martin or devaluing the work of Dr. King, nor do I believe that any of the posthumous praise and adulation that he garners is unwarranted. What I do believe is that brother El-Hajj Malik El-Shabazz should be given more recognition to match his major contribution to the ongoing struggle of the black family in America. I’m also a disbeliever in the idea that these two men even before they began to overtly meet in the middle were as ideologically and diametrically opposed to one another as history and even their own musings might suggest. Their overlapping movements in many ways worked in concert. They were both equally effective and neither one of them would have been successful leaders had they employed their style of leadership/protest in the other persons region. i.e if King was leading a movement in the north his early pacifist style would not have played well. At best he would have simply been another Harlem store front street preacher. For Malcolm’s part if he were leading a protest movement in Montgomery or Selma, the first time he called Bull Conner a white devil he would have had a silver bullet in his black ass. I say that to say that even though they may have publicly quibbled with the others respective leadership style, they were both deep enough thinkers and anti-myopic enough to know that the nature of the beast that they opposed largely dictated the style of fight that they employed. Both men made skillful use of the press and they leveraged their ability to create headlines to greatly improve the lives of not only black people but poor folks below and above the Mason-Dixon line.
A worldwide movement was burgeoning before both Malcolm and Martin were gunned down at the tender age of 39. They both in their own unique way successfully conveyed to the world that the American Negroes fight for civil rights was part and parcel to the global struggle of all oppressed people for human rights. By changing the goal from Civil Rights, (something that could be both granted and restricted by the man made powers that be), to the fight for human rights–something that only the creator is recognized as being endowed enough to give or take. Both Malcolm and Martin became international and more importantly interracial leaders of a global movement once they expanded their respective visions. That made them both a threat to the status quo. Hence they left us much sooner than we were prepared for.
Some 50 years after their deaths the Status quo has made a major comeback in the area of controlling, manipulating and confusing the hearts and minds of the majority populace. I was asked the other day where is today’s Malcolm X for this generations lost tribe of Shabazz. More or less the query rhetorically was suggesting one, that we needed another Malcolm, and two there are no more Malcolm’s in the ether to cultivate into an El-Hajj Malik El-Shabazz. My answer was that I don’t think it’s a matter of leadership that’s lacking so much as there is a lack unity among the people and a lack of an ability to humble ourselves before one another to achieve a common cause while furthering the objectives as posited by men like Malcolm.
In Malcolm and Kings day it really was not hard for them to find a common cause. Far too many of us are too comfortable with our own status quo to identify with a common revolutionary cause today. It is a lot harder to create an effective and sustainable movement for the masses to follow–even with the advent of social media . In many ways it has to get collectively and exponentially worse in order for the requisite critical mass to build up high enough to birth the kind of public angst potent enough to prop up leaders like Martin and Malcolm because make no mistake about it, the genius that went into the making of those great men is not obsolete and exists to this day. It runs through the collective unconscious of more of our people today than many of us are willing to admit. We are simply too comfortable as a collective. So in the absence of wishing for more dire straits to visit our people (I prefer to think that the worst is behind us)instead of wishing for another Malcolm or Martin to come back I will simply remain thankful for the myriad lessons that they imparted in the truncated lives that they lived. King showed America what the black man was capable of when properly resourced from birth. And Malcolm showed the world that a rose really could grow from the concrete. Happy birthday sir!
I’ve often been told that I was angry. An angry black man to be exact. I used to vehemently reject that label until I took stock of all the things that pissed me off and/or truly had enough power over me to disrupt my mood. More things in this world, especially as it pertains to social justice and uplift anger me than I care to admit. For the sake of clarity I’m gonna give you 10 reasons why I’m an Angry Black Man.
To be a negro in this country and to be relativity conscious is to be in a rage almost all of the time ~ James Baldwin
1. The myth of Ronald Reagan
Ronald Wilson Reagan was known as the “Great Communicator”. As with most labels, talking points and platitudes from the right, the moniker “Great Communicator” is euphemistic speak for something much more sinister. By great communicator they really mean to say that he was a great liar. One that is able to effectively articulate the dastardly deeds that his party had in store for the country by couching said message in between some innocuous sound bites with his signature evil grin. Our 40th president saved his best acting for his post Hollywood career because his emulating even a marginally effective sitting president was a more Oscar worthy performance than anything he ever had as the B list actor that he was.
I would have to dedicate an entire blog post to the guy recite all the ways in which Reagan was a foul and failed president, so for the sake of brevity I will provide a truncated list of infractions
All in all the dude sucked royally and the hero worship he receives today should be enough to drive any sane man mad–so yeah, I’m angry about that.
2. Fox News and the Corporate media conglomerates that purposely confuses the masses
The Fairness Doctrine was created in 1949 due to a rise in misinformation and outright propaganda being accepted as empirical fact by much of the public. For 50 years it for the most part succeeded in keeping the public informed when it came to matters germane to its interest. When Ronald Reagan took office in 1980 he immediately began chipping away at this law until it was finally abolished in 1987. So if you ever wondered why the Bill O’Reilly’s’, Sean Hannity’s and Rush Limbaugh’s of the world incessantly heap praise on one of the worst presidencies in the modern era, understand that these men would not have jobs in media were it not for Ronald Reagan doing away with a law that forbade them from being the lying talking heads that they are today–at least not unchallenged. Thus began the making of the anti-intellectual society that we currently suffer through today.
The idiot age that has finally come to fruition was not just the fault of Reagan and his right-wing party, it was a bi-partisan hit job on the American people because not even 10 years after the Fairness Doctrine was repealed by Reagan, Bill Clinton signed the Telecommunications Act of 1996 (the very year that Fox News was born) which basically killed mom and pop ownership of local media and granted corporate owned media outlets carte blanche powers to consolidate media markets around the country. The end result is a lot more media voices with a whole lot less diversity in the perspective that powers those many voices. Fast forward to 2014 where millions of people hold steadfast to truths that have absolutely no basis in fact ,like where this president was born or what religion he claims or even more long standing and scientifically proven facts like the world being older than 6000 years. Either way it’s enough to drive any sane person mad. So for the sake of sanity Fox is a major reason why I’m an Angry Black Man!
3. The Ban the N-word movement
I’m personally offended that the word nigga has some how become the only word in the English lexicon that Americans ( black & white) feel need to be banned( regardless of the context). I’m not here to defend the words usage but I do question the logic being employed. What good is getting rid of the word nigga if you are doing nothing to abate the nigga condition? That’s sort of like putting on deodorant without taking a shower.
Several years ago I watched in sheer disgust as the NAACP conducted a mock funeral for the word. It was an utter spectacle and an all-time low for the organization that still calls itself colored. The only thing more ridiculous than the idea of trying to bury a word that has been an active part of the urban vernacular for most of the 20th century (and on into the new millennium) is the guy they choose to bury the word. They actually had Kwame Kilpatrick do the Eulogy.
How are you going to ask an n-word to bury the n-word?
If such a sad spectacle (and major fail) was not bad enough we now have the NFL commissioner stepping into the fray to give his unsolicited, unwanted and unworthy opinion on the matter (backed by punitive measures). Now mind you this is the same guy that has neither the empathy nor social awareness to lend a sympathetic ear to the concerns of the Native American population that take serious umbrage with the Redskin moniker. Now he wants to interject and legislate the speech of black men in the NFL– ain’t that some shit!?! Even more maddening is the fact that I hear so many black people co-sign this foolish and morally empty gesture. They act like he’s doing this out of sheer altruism and not because of the fact that two of his white players purposely used the word in its most offensive contexts. So basically he’s going to penalize the black players in the game because he has two white players who embarrassed the league this year. Yeah, that makes a whole lot of sense.
4. Reality Television
I’m first and foremost mad at myself for knowing who many of the characters on these shows are in the first place. Unfortunately for me I tend to vicariously follow these shows via my Facebook timeline every time they come on. If it was as simple as blocking (or deleting) the people that watch these sort of programs and provide play-by-play details of the ratchet optics, believe me I would. But it’s not that easy because these shows have captivated people of all walks. From the projects to the pulpits these “reality” programs have become cult like hit shows– especially with black women. I even have sisters that religiously watch these wayward programs telling me that I should stop using the N-Word. The audacity niggacity of these particular women truly befuddle me. It’s wrong to say the word nigga but completely okay to act out the worst of nigga behavior for all the world to see and even worse, for young impressionable minds to think that such untoward behavior as exhibited on these shows are okay to emulate.
the more of this young girls see on TV…
The more of this we will all see on World star Hip Hop…
She Watch Channel Zero was song on Public Enemy’s ‘It takes a Nation of Millions To Hold Us Back’ album that dropped way back in 1988. It no longer takes a nation of millions to hold black people back–Bravo is doing a pretty good job at it.
5. Black Conservatives and the house nigger mentality
The good Dr. Clarke said it all. Nothing left for me to add. Actually I have plenty to add but I have so much disdain to express vis-a-vis the house nigger mentality that it would take an entire blog post dedicated to the subject.
6. White Supremacy
White Supremacy is indeed one of the most wide spread un-diagnosed mental illnesses that exist today. It’s an affliction that transcends religion, race, creed, culture, and geographic boundaries. When white people in America finally get a grip on what an insidious force white supremacy is and begin to successfully combat it, the world as we know it will begin to move towards peace. The world would also begin to see a semblance of fairness as it pertains to how the wealth of the world is redistributed.
White supremacy is not just the enemy of black people and indigenous people across the globe, white supremacy is also an enemy to most white people. Why? Because it’s a facade. A mere false notion whereby the top 2-5 percent reap 85 percent of the benefits that the majority champion–under the guise of white privilege. It really is high time that White America collectively wake up and realize that the greatest problems that this country face were caused and co-signed by a white majority. The wayward white male voting patterns are to blame for all of the wars and strife that engulf this nation– almost 100 percent. From the countries two longest running wars in Afghanistan and Iraq all the way back to the Civil War (and before) where over 500,000 died quite literally in the name of preserving white supremacy (99 percent of the participants did NOT own slaves).
Congressman Paul Ryan recently made headlines for what could only be labeled a “blame it on the blacks” excuse (for pretty much all of the countries financial woes).
“there is a tailspin of culture, in our inner cities in particular, of men not working and just generations of men not even thinking about working or learning the value and the culture of work…So there’s a real culture problem here…that has to be dealt with.” ~ Congress Paul Ryan
Now this is coming from a man that voted to go to war in Iraq (2 trillion plus tax dollars), he voted for the Afghan war (2 plus trillion tax dollars) and the Bush tax Cuts (1 trillion). Now that’s at least 5 trillion dollars alone that this man wasted since becoming a congressman. Then there’s the Medicare part D boondoggle that’s costing the tax payers 62 billion alone this year with the progressive scale that it’s on promising to raise that figure to 150 billion annually by 2019.
Now you don’t need to know algebra (or even a calculator) to come to the conclusion that congressman Paul Ryan’s proclivity for wasteful spending is far more responsible for the nations 16 trillion dollar debt than anything going on in the hood. Even he knows this. The quoted Paul Ryan musing is what you call a dog whistle. A sort of wink wink codec to white Americans to say, “once we get rid of our black problem all will be right in the country”–meanwhile he’s robbing them blind increasing their taxation while decreasing their representation in the form of tangible government benefits and services. This of course is not a new tactic. It’s a tried and true method of coalescing their base. This Southern Strategy that congressman Paul and others in his party actively employ is wholly dependent on the white supremacist worldview. Lyndon B Johnson best expressed this phenomena when he said:
“If you can convince the lowest white man he’s better than the best colored man, he won’t notice you’re picking his pocket. Hell, give him somebody to look down on, and he’ll empty his pockets for you.”~ LBJ
LBJ in appealing to the white Southerners common sense was able to help them help themselves by getting his Great Society programs off the ground–the very same Great Society programs that are under attack by Paul Ryan and others under the guise of fixing the countries black problem.
The presidency of Barack Obama has galvanized the dormant descendants of the Dixiecrat movement (think Tea Party) and got them reengaged in the political process and this is the fools gold that Ryan and others in his fledgling party are playing to. Lee Atwater who was a former Reagan Aide and former campaign manger for George H.W Bush is known as the modern day architect of the Nixon Strategy. He in very laymen terms explained to Ryan and others how to execute this strategy in 1981 when he said:
“You start out in 1954 by saying, “Nigger, nigger, nigger.” By 1968 you can’t say “nigger” — that hurts you. Backfires. So you say stuff like forced busing, states’ rights and all that stuff. You’re getting so abstract now [that] you’re talking about cutting taxes, and all these things you’re talking about are totally economic things and a byproduct of them is [that] blacks get hurt worse than whites. And subconsciously maybe that is part of it. I’m not saying that. But I’m saying that if it is getting that abstract, and that coded, that we are doing away with the racial problem one way or the other. You follow me — because obviously sitting around saying, “We want to cut this,” is much more abstract than even the busing thing, and a hell of a lot more abstract than “Nigger, nigger” ~ Lee Atwater (as Reagan aide)
This lesson from Atwater has not been lost on anyone in today’s republican party. It however was not his last message to them or the masses. It is also one that is sadly lost on them all. Lee Atwater’s death bed mea culpa should serve as a stark and dire warning to the GOP that today employs the worst of what he had to offer the world and to the part of white america that still needs to feel a sense of ethnic and cultural superiority in order to vote for a given candidate.
“My illness helped me to see that what was missing in society is what was missing in me: a little heart, a lot of brotherhood. The ’80s were about acquiring — acquiring wealth, power, prestige. I know. I acquired more wealth, power, and prestige than most. But you can acquire all you want and still feel empty. What power wouldn’t I trade for a little more time with my family? What price wouldn’t I pay for an evening with friends? It took a deadly illness to put me eye to eye with that truth, but it is a truth that the country, caught up in its ruthless ambitions and moral decay, can learn on my dime. I don’t know who will lead us through the ’90s, but they must be made to speak to this spiritual vacuum at the heart of American society, this tumor of the soul”~ Lee Atwater (from his death bed)
Even those who have benefited the most form the white supremacist construct at the end of life regret harboring such a divisive and superficial worldview. Those in America that don’t actually benefit from such a worldview would be doing themselves (and the world around them) great justice by ridding themselves of such an ideology.
7. Stand Your Ground and The rise of the Zimmerman defense
The Zimmerman affect should be enough to raise the ire of every person of color who happens to be, or have love ones that are young black men. The gross injustice doled in the wake of the cold blooded murders of Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and the subsequent exoneration for the murderous intent that went into their killing is as frightening as it is maddening.
The George Zimmerman acquittal and his failure to initially be arrested for the crime of murder was about white supremacy. The fact that a mostly white jury could not bring themselves to convict Michael Dunn for the cold blooded premeditated murder of an unarmed 17 year old Jordan Davis despite mounds of evidence is because of white supremacy.
The sense of entitlement and the victim-hood displayed by both George Zimmerman and especially Michael Dunn is the most maddening aspect of their trials. The following quote by Michel Dunn in a conversation with his girlfriend sums up perfectly what’s wrong with his thought process
You know I was thinking about that today, I was like I’m the fucking victim here, I was the one who was victimized, I mean I don’t know how else to cut it, like they attacked me, I’m the victim. I’m the victor, but I was the victim too.”
Since the untimely and racially charged murders of Trayvonn Martin and Jordan Davis more innocent unarmed black people were inexplicably gunned down by white men. Robert Bruce Black, Brian Cloninger, Theodore Wafer and Claudius Smith all joined the ranks of “victims that needed to stand their ground by gunning down a defenseless black person. Apparently it’s a dream of many white men to gun down an unarmed black kid and beat the case. They want to be like George like we wanted to be like Mike. It’s disgusting and any black man that is not angry at this seemingly growing trend is devoid of both a brain and spinal cord.
8. Black bigotry, intolerance and overall lack of political astuteness
The opposite of white supremacy is progress. White supremacy on its face is regressive and reactionary politics/policy. Policies promoted to purposely divide the populous (divide and conquer) to foster a society more ripe for corrupt capitalist to exploit.
Far too many of my so called conscious brothers think that the answer to white supremacy and all of its affects is black unity in the form of huddling the black masses (all 13-15 percent of the country’s black population) and in Marcus Garvey like fashion building our own colony away from from the “evil white man”. What such a supposition fails to account for is the inherent good and evil that exists in all men. If you talk ALL black men with you to that colony of blackness you would no doubt be taking some inherently evil and flawed minded black men with you.
First and foremost our percentages in this country are such that we need other groups to vote along side us in order to maximize a progressive minded influence. As black people we must disabuse the notion that that we are this countries most aggrieved population (even if we are) and be able to look for enough past our own historical disenfranchisement to empathize with the contemporaneous disenfranchisement of others. Even if their current plight is is not nearly as bad as the reverberations of the disenfranchisement wrought on our ancestors. If we are not going to join or co-sign the movements of the LGBT community, the immigrant community or any of the other groups like the labor movement, or women’s suffrage movement then the least that we should be doing is NOT speaking ill of those movements or worse–joining the chorus of hate and misunderstanding as it pertains to those respective groups.
One of the biggest criticisms of Obama is his lack of a “black agenda”. In that critic I often hear black people bemoan the fact that this president has done so many things for gays an immigrants, but nothing for blacks. This is a critique often bantered about by some of the more politically astute blacks. What I often find myself explaining (to no avail) to the men and women that make these proclamations is that the measures that this administration took on behalf of the LGBT community and the immigrant community were low hanging fruit. He did what any person of conscious would have done in his position at this pivotal time in history. There is no such silver bullet to solve what ails inner city America. There is nothing to repeal with a mere pen stroke. Our issues are much more deeply rooted. Therefore the panacea requires much deeper thoughts and far less regurgitation of bygone era black separatist politics.
At best black people comprise 15 percent of the countries population but our contribution to what made America the first world power that she is in no less than 50 percent. This country literally moves to the beat of the African drum. Wear that as a sense of pride but disabuse the notion that we are superior and are best served by separation from territories that our ancestors helped to build. While in many ways it may seem that we are regressing but we are a long way from were we started. I would not want to live in the 40’s, 50’s or 60’s. We were doing far worse collectively. White supremacy has to continue to die out. It’s dying a slow death and whatever we can do to speed up that death would assist in moving not only the black community forward but this whole nation and the world as well. One final thought to ponder…
There could be no Michael Jordan if there were no James Naismith ~ Unknown
9. Respectable Negros
The respectable Negro is not to be confused with the House Nigger and definitely not to be confused with the negro that simply shows respect to their fellow man.
If there was an aviator in the dictionary to represent the respectable negro it would probably be a picture of the HRNIC (head respectable negro in charge) himself Don Lemon. If you know Don Lemon and can identify his major malfunction than you know what i mean when I speak about the anguish that respectable Negroes world wide are able to illicit in you average angry black man. If you are unfamiliar with the antics of Don Lemon then I have to apprise you on what a respectable negro is in a future blog post. For now judge for yourself…
10. Today’s hip hop landscape
I was born in 1973, the same year that many historians of the genre credit Cool Herc with creating rap. I was also born and reared in Brooklyn NY which is arguably responsible for birthing the worlds greatest MC’s hailing from any single borough, city, county or municipal jurisdiction, so when I see what has become of the culture it makes me Mad Rapper type angry.
We went from this….
I can’t be the only one mad at what has become of the culture.