Round 2 of the Democratic debates: The Winners, Losers, and folks who need not come back

After two nights and twenty contenders the results are in. The debate winners, the debate losers and the ones that would be doing us all a favor by debating from the couch or some pundits chair for the third debate in September. Ranked in order from best to worst…

Night one

THE WINNERS CIRCLE

Elizabeth Warren—Elizabeth Warren came out with another strong performance and was the clear winner(of both nights). She was attacked off the break and clearly had a plan for it because she left the stage with at least one body in tow. She was forceful and fearless in the face of Omni-directional attacks with none of them sticking. Expect her to get another post debate bump. She’s the real deal. 

Line of the night: “I don’t know why anyone goes to the trouble to run for president to talk about what we can’t do and what we won’t fight for”

Bernie Sanders—Like Warren, Bernie came  under a lot of “friendly fire” and likeWarren he was ready. His counter punches were Floyd Mayweather like. And again like Warren he left with a body. Actually he left with a Zombie since he essentially killed the same dude that was previously murdered by his tag team partner. 

Line of the night: “By the way, the healthcare industry will be advertising tonight on this program” (to modarator Jake Tapper)

Marianne Williamson— Marianne had a far less eccentric debate than her first. Her presence amounted to a breath of fresh air for a stale and long stagnant body politic. She brought a much needed spiritual element to the race and one that would be wise of the others to incorporate into their daily diatribes on the stump. She made it crystal clear (to anyone with a third eye) that in addition to the partisan wars afoot there is a spiritual war to be fought and that we had better gear up for that battle in this asymmetric war for the soul of this nation. While everyone and their mamma knows that she will not come close to winning the nomination, her infusing the process with some much needed spiritual enlightenment can only be a boon for the party. When she does finally drop out her endorsement will be significant.

Line of the night: “If you think any of this wonkiness is going to deal with this dark psychic force of the collectivized hatred that this president is bringing up in this country, then I’m afraid that the Democrats are going to see some very dark days,” 

Pete Buttige— Mayor Pete had a decent debate. He managed to parlay his Rhode Scholar education and his above average oratory skills into a decent debate performance. I don’t know that it is enough to lift him from the basement where he’s currently polling but it definitely will keep the corporate dollars coming so count on seeing more Mayor Pete.

Line of the night: “It is time to stop worrying about what the Republicans will say. It is true if we embrace a far-left agenda, they are going to say we are a bunch of crazy socialists. If we embrace a conservative agenda, you know what they’re going to do? They’re going to say we’re a bunch of crazy socialists. So let’s just stand up for the right policy and go out there and defend it.”

Steve Bullock— The Montana governor in his first and possibly last debate showing did not do awful, but he did not do great that great either. His very worthy mission to remove dark money from politics is laudable but next to impossible because its too much dark money drowning him out his message. And I’m not even talking about the swampy dark money in the Trumpublican party and RNC–I’m talking about the dark money flowing some of the very same candidates he was sharing the stage with.

Line of the night: I honestly can’t remeber

Beto O’Rourke— The good news is unlike the last debate and unlike your boy Waldo there was at least a Beto sighting. He was lively and had a few good moments. The bad news is he did nothing to revive his campaign that’s basically on life support. There’s a US Senate seat up for grabs in Texas. He should probably aim a little lower than he is right now.

Line of the night: “There is a new battleground state: Texas, and it has 38 Electoral College votes”

Losers Circle

Amy Klobuchar— Iv’e never in my life met an Amy that was extraordinary or memorable in any discernible way. In fact every Amy that I’ve ever encountered has been borderline mediocre. Night one of debate number two did little to change this salient fact (no offense to anyone named Amy). 

Line of the night: People named Amy don’t have lines of the night. They just breath loud.

John Hickenlooper— Johnny Boy did not have very many good moments in the night one debate. In fact by my count he had exactly zero. If I were to put on my conspiracy theory hat I would say that he’s running in this race not so much to win but to play part of the inorganic consensus being pushed by the establishment that most voters don’t want radical progressive changes. I don’t know that he helped that cause either.

Line of the night: “This notion that you’re going to take away private insurance for 180 million Americans, who — many of them don’t want to give it up, many of them do want to get rid of it but some don’t, many don’t — or you’re going to with the Green New Deal make sure every American is guaranteed the government job that they want. That is a disaster at ballot box. You might as well FedEx the election to Donald Trump.” 

Tim Ryan— Timmy turned in another underwhelming performance. He did manage to get more talk time in during the second debate. The bad news is nobody was listening. Even worse he had flashbacks of that time he ran across his geriatric neighbors freshly manicured lawn.

Line of the night: “I know, I wrote the damn bill!”

John Delany– John like the John Hickenlooper before him  (and Timmy before that) were placed in this contest for one reason and one reason only. To be the great white hope dope in waiting just in case the preferred great white hope falters in the contest. I have reason to believe that all three failed in their commissioned goals so it is less than likely that you will see any of them in the next round of debates

Line of the night: Who the fuck cares?

Night Two

THE WINNERS CIRCLE  

Julián Castro— Julian had a very good debate performance and made good use of his limited talk time. With the success that Kamala had in debate number one the strategy was obvious–Go at the former vice presidents neck and for the most part that’s what most of them did. The difference however between how Castro went about taking down the perceived front runner and how the rest of the field went about it is the difference between organic matter and inorganic matter.

When the news shows and talking heads report on Julián’s “attack” on Biden they normally start the clip at the point when he verbally smacks him making it seem premeditated (as many of the other attacks against him and his record). The truth is Julián was on the stage minding his own business selling his own ideas when Biden thought it prudent to come for him. Now we can agree or disagree with his assertion that crossing the border should be decriminalized but I’m guessing Biden wishes that he would have silently disagreed.

Julian Castro to no one in particular: “‘Open borders’ is a right-wing talking point, And frankly, I’m disappointed that some folks, including some folks on this stage, have taken the bait.”

Colorado Senator Mike Bennett gave him the shaken head white man universal disapproval gesture while pivoting to his own immigration talking points followed by Kirsten Gillabrand and Kamala Harris. Biden decides he wants to circle back to Castro’s quip.

Joe Biden: “Julián, excuse me, the secretary, We sat together in many meetings. I never heard him talk about any of this when he was the secretary.” Joe Biden:

Line of the night: “Mr. Vice President, it looks like one of us has learned the lessons of the past. One of us hasn’t What we need are politicians who have some guts on this issue”

Cory Booker--Cory came into the contest in desperate need of a break out moment and while he indeed got that moment (a few actually), it came about far more inorganically than Castro’s or even some of the others that made it to the winners circle on night two. He had been sparing with back and forth with the former Vice President for the weeks leading up to the debate so it came as no surprise that he was going to come for Biden which he did. For the most part his punches landed. Biden got in a few good ones on him but for the most part Cory stayed on message which was mostly that positive and happy go lucky talk about bringing the country together. I mean ain’t no body believing all that kumbaya bullshit but he did do well enough to come in second place for night two

Line of the night: “Mr. Vice President, you can’t have it both ways, You invoke President Obama more than anybody in this campaign. You can’t do it when it’s convenient and then dodge it when it’s not.”

Andrew Yang–Andrew had a decent showing. He got off a few good lines and lets be real, most of ya’ll signed up to get that $125 from the Equifax breach knowing your credit unworthiness makes you least likely to be hacked. Who would not want $1,000 per month free and clear no questions or strings attached? Sign me up!

Line of the night: “We need to do the opposite of much of what we’re doing right now, and the opposite of Donald Trump is an Asian man who likes math”

Tulsi Gabbard– Tulsi is another low percenter that finally had her moment. She came at Kamala pretty hard on her criminal justice record. It was not earth shattering but for the fact that Kamala had no response to the attack she would not be part of the winning circle (or at least further down).

Line of the night:

“When you were in a position to make a difference and an impact in these people’s lives, you did not, There’s no excuse for that and the people who suffered under your reign as a prosecutor, you owe them an apology.”

Bill Deblasio– Bill DeBlasio, also known as the 4th moderator, made it to the winners circle if for no other reason his persistence. If I was not Brooklyn born and bred I’d say something like “Bill is the typical annoying ass New Yorker(that does not mean you should not state the obvious). And while he is just that, his performance warrants some merit because they were so heavily issue oriented in an otherwise low brow debate devoid of true substance. At least in a contextual sense. It was a lot of surface speak. Even when threatened by his fellow moderators that his time would be cut short for be interrupting they would often come back to him to allow him to reiterate the talking points that he just got off on the next persons watch so it really is hard to call him a loser on that night. Even if most New Yorkers believe him to be just that.

Line of the night: “For all the American citizens out there who feel you’re falling behind, who feel the American dream is not working for you, the immigrants didn’t do that to you,” The big corporations did that to you. The 1 percent did that to you.” 

Micheal Bennett– Senator Michael Bennett had a fairly decent performance and made good use of the time allotted. While he did not do much to get him in the top tier, he did bring some much needed clarity and relevance to the vapid busing back and forth between the two top tier candidates that he shared the stage with.

Line of the night:  “This is the fourth debate that we have had, and the second time that we have been debating what people did 50 years ago with busing, when our schools are as segregated as they were 50 years ago,We need a conversation about what’s happening now, and when there’s a group of kids in this country that don’t get preschool through no fault of their own and another group does—equal is not equal..We’ve got a group of K–12 schools that are good because families can spend a million bucks, and you got the Detroit public schools that are as segregated as they were.”Equal is not equal.

Losers Circle

Kirsten Gillibrand–Kirsten has been searching for that magic moment in this campaign since her Al Franken false start. Debate number two did not change that fact.

Line of the night: “So, the first thing that I’m going to do when I’m president is I’m going to Clorox the Oval Office”  (I know. Corny AF)

Jay Inslee— Colorado Governor Jay Inslee had for the most part an uneventful debate. With his pet issue being attacking climate change, there’s no great loss to that cause as it has unanimously been adopted by the entire field.

Line of the night: Does it really matter???

Joe Biden–If you listen to the arm chair Monday morning pundits you would walk away believing that Biden had a half way decent performance. And in their defense it was a half way decent performance given the bar was set so low for the supposed front runner and best equipped candidate to take on Trump that all he had to do was not fall asleep on stage to get good press clippings the following day. If however you believe your lying eyes and ears over the Morning Joe set you’d come away with a similar conclusion. In Biden’s defense virtually everyone on stage had their sights trained on him and most of them got off at least one good dinger. To his credit he at least tried to hit back this time and actually landed a few good ones. But overall his performance was very poor. On at least three occasions he could not finish his thoughts while in mid-sentence. Cory Booker rightly called him out for hiding behind the Obama legacy for all things good but running away when anything even remotely controversial or in need of deeper analysis was on the docket. Even worse he and his team in the mainstream media have created a post debate narrative that all of the contenders shooting daggers at him are really shooting daggers at Obama as a way to inoculate himself from a credible critique of his questionable policies of the past and present.

Line of the night: “Go Easy on my kid”

Kamala Harris— Senator Kamala Harris had a really bad night. She actually performed better than Joe Biden and at least a couple of the others that were ranked higher on this list. She gets last place because for at least the last week or so Tulsi Gabbart had been telling anyone that would lend her their ear that she was coming for Kamala. Jake Tapper knew, Bashar Al Assad knew and even the Russian bots who normally traffic in falsehoods knew that Tulsi was bringing some smoke for Kamala. Jake Tapper being the messy shit starter that he is set Tulsi up perfectly for the kill and she went in. Kamala gave a weak response and referee Jake Tapper threw it back to Tulsi to pile on even more. Kamala was given another chance to respond and she basically said she’d rather speak on Biden.

 “That is simply not true.”

To quickly summarize the two debates night one was Greco Roman Wrestling while night two was straight WWE. The two top tier candidates were well versed, well prepared and obviously practiced what they were going to preach. The two top tier candidates from night two were winging it and by all objective measures they failed miserably.

The Myth of the Emasculation of the Black Male in America

When Billy Porter decided to dawn a custom Tuxedo dress for Oscars I’m pretty sure that he knew that he’d steal the red carpet spotlight. What I’m not sure he was aware of about his red carpet choice is that it  would spark (or re-ignite) a heated conversation about black masculinity and the conspiracy (real or perceived) to emasculate the black male. It is this authors opinion that there is indeed a problem of emasculated black men in America. However I don’t know that any of them showed up at the Oscar’s or where dresses.

 

e·mas·cu·late

/ēˈmaskyəˌlāt/verb

  1. 1.deprive (a man) of his male role or identity.”in his mind, her success emasculated him”

We can’t have a conversation about emasculated black males without including the most powerful black men in the country. Otherwise what’s point? If the emasculated black man is a problem for you and you are not talking about the black men in congress you don’t really have a problem with emasculated black men. You have a problem with gay men and you should at least be honest enough with yourself to admit as much.

 

 

Ayanna Pressley (D-Mass.) , Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-N.Y.) , Ilhan Omar (D-Minn.) and Rashida Tlaib (D-Mich) have courageously taken the congress by storm speaking the harsh truth to power broaching taboo issues with vigor and honesty that many of the black men that have preceded them by decades have never even thought to broach.

What’s worse is these black men when these woman are taking bullets for their courageous stances are no where to be found when it comes time to defend them effectively leaving these four women to defend themselves from omni-directional   racist and  sexist attacks. When Rep Ilhan Omar made the infamous “All about the Benjamins” tweet she was widely condemned–from the GOP, the media and many in her party. She was forced to apologize for making an antisemitic comment even though nothing at all was antisemitic about what she said. Not one of the black males in congress thought to shield this young lady from any of the bullets aimed her way. I wonder why.

After being forced to apologize for telling the truth she was made the subject of racist, Islamaphobic tweets from the WV GOP. But none of the people that condemned her for telling the truth said anything about racist attacks on her. 

Ilhan

 

 

Greg Meeks for an example is a “strong progressive voice” surely he would take umbrage with the racist manner in which is colleague. After all he went to great lengths to rebuke Minister Farrakhan for what he perceived  as an antisemitic comment made by him. So he has to have something to say about what was said about Rep Omar. After all she too is a Semite.

Meeks on Farakhan

Got all this smoke for Farrakhan on behalf of the poor oppressed Jews of the world but So far no Twitter mentions on behalf of his colleague. 

 

Hakeem Jeffries who is in the number three position within the democratic caucus.  You can catch him on CNN or MSNBC any day spitting daggers at Trump. Surely he’d at least take to Twitter to get the sisters back…

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I searched his twitter high and low for a sign of manhood in the form of speaking real truth to real power, but nope. Then I recalled that time that Israel went on one of their many offensives versus a defenseless Palestinian population in Gaza whereby babies were being blown up kids were being taken out by snipers and Israel was naturally being condemned by the international community. Hakeem had this much to say at the AIPAC rally for Israel in Brooklyn.

“We know Israel lives in a very tough neighborhood, and there are certain realities to that. We mourn the loss of civilian life on both sides of the conflict. But when you live in a tough neighborhood Israel should not be made to apologize for its strength. You know why? Because the only thing that neighbors respect in a tough neighborhood is strength.” ~ Hakeem Jeffries

Those are the thoughts of an emasculated black male because as black men  strong Black men our job is to fight against white supremacy not on behalf of it. And make no mistake Star of David white supremacy is still white supremacy.

 

It took a strong woman of color to get the sisters back which further impugns the manhood of the  emasculated black Milquetoast men in congress…

AOC gets Ilhans back

Then there was this fiasco where once again a sister speaking the cold hard truth about something that frankly this brother should have taken more umbrage with. 

meadows-cummings-tlaib

As the head of the committee Rep Cummings should have been the first person to rebuke Rep Meadows for his shameless display of tokenism. Instead he left it up to the women of color on the committee to handle their white man problem.  

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To make matters worse even after she emasculated the white man for talking reckless the long emasculated black men came to his defense. Will the non-emasculated black men in congress please stand up and be heard? There’s little sign that they exist.

In summation if you have a problem with a black man who on his free will puts on a dress to celebrate his idol or his sexual freedom but don’t have a problem with all these powerful black men who has Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s  hand up their skirts grabbing and leading them by their vagina’s you are focused on all the wrong things…

 

 

Top 10 Coons of 2018

2018 was yet another year of classic coonery. In this Trumpian era error that we’re in the midst of  there seems to be a new breed of coon brewing in urban America. I can’t quite place a finger on what it is about the Orange Idiot that’s giving rise to this samboian outbreak but it is at least in part to his extreme narcissism and extra rapey ways. What I have noticed is that a lot of the black men that support or defend the reckless behavior of this current president exhibit some of his most untoward and reckless personality traits. At least that’s the theory I’m going with. I digress…With out further ado here’s your Top ten for 2018…

10. The Baby Coon Bootcampers

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Random Fun fact: A group of raccoons are called a nursery or gaze. 

When I was a young dumb 20-30 something I did my fair share of really dumb things. Thankfully camera phones were not ubiquitous devices back then as they are now. I’m even more thankful that my formative young adult years did not coincide with a rabid coon outbreak such as the one that led to this gaze gathering at the White House. Some of these young and dumb millennial’s will live to regret this photo op while others in this nursery will grow up to be full blown coons. Either way this posterior inspired photo op will be around for posterity so whether or not these young, dumb malleable minded minions will inextricably linked to the Class of coon 2018.

9. Herschel The Coon Walker

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When you’re born black and the black folks that birthed you feels fit to name you Herschel, it’s not 100 percent your fault that you grew up to be a coon. Herschel and President Adolt Twittler go back to to his failed days as a professional football franchise owner.

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He was literally Benedict Donald’s original favorite field Negro…So it should come as no surprise that decades later he’d make the smooth transition to the prototypical house negro.

 8. Jim “Crow” Brown

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Speaking of former NFL running backs suffering from CTE there’s this old fool. Many thought that his dalliance with coonery would be brief and by now he’d humbly come back to the tribe to petition for forgiveness ala Chrisette Michele. Nope! He’s a proud coon and is as perennial a member of the top ten coon list as he was the Pro Bowl. Ya’ll boy is gone for good. 

7. Jason “the Witless wannabe white wonder”Whitlock

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Jason Whitlock is what you would call an OC (original coon). What differentiates Fatlock from the fuck boys (and girls) that precede him on this list is the fact that his Tom Coonery did not start (at least publicly) during Jive 45’s infamous and most unfortunate rise to the presidency. In other words cooning has always been part of his DNA. In his defense he has no discernible talents so cooning is next to 100 percent responsible for his success in life. So while he knows next to nothing about the sports that he’s paid to report on and he’s obviously never played a sport outside of maybe a hot dog eating contest or three, his value to his employer Fox Sports  is his ability to assuage and massage  the  fragile white ego of white supremacist sports fans across the nation. Something that he’s pretty good at. Nobody can make bald, fat, nonathletic couch potatoes feel superior to the Colin Kapernicks and LeBron James of the world like Whitlock is able to do. Believe it or not that takes as much skill as it does audacity.

6. A Nigga named Paris (Dennard)

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Say a prayer for our boy Paris. He had a pretty rough year. He spent most of the year taking verbal beat downs on CNN while frivolously failing at defending the foolishness of the Dump administration in viscerally embarrassing fashion. After stacking all them L’s CNN ended up cutting ties with him for being a pervert. No offense to the #MeToo movement but that boy ain’t hardly interested in vagina. It really was a misunderstanding…

5. Bobcat  Johnson

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Bob Johnson on the low has been cooning forever. The Founder of BET was one of the early culture vultures of hip hop. His cooning reached a crescendo in 2008 while campaigning for Hilliary Clinton in the 2008 Democratic Primary vs then Senator Barack Obama. At a black church of all places he dropped the timeless jewel
“As an African American, I’m frankly insulted that the Obama campaign would imply that we are so stupid that we would think Bill and Hillary Clinton, who have been deeply and emotionally involved in black issues when Barack Obama was doing something in the neighborhood that I won’t say what he was doing, but he said it in his book,”  ~ Bob Johnson

Who would have thunk that 10 years later he’d be palling around with her arch enemy and the father or modern day white supremacist terror.

4. Coondace Owens

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The baby coon summit was the brainchild of Ms Owens. Her corrupting so many minors in a single coon swoop should be enough to land her on this list. She has become one the darlings of conservative media and white people who prefer their blacks to be kind of racist towards other blacks. Like a nigga named Paris she takes a major L every time she ventures away from the Fox News studio to opine on shit she has no clue about–like life itself. If the term Poor little tink tink had an avatar. It would be this whack ass chic and that was made abundantly clear the day she dared to debate Dr. Micheal Eric Dyson on MSNBC.

3. Uncle Ben Carcinogen 

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Uncle Ben is making black history and he don’t even know it. In every horror movie the black guy dies first. This black guy is two years in and still running. Many careers have come and died entering the Trump White house and this nigga is still breathing. That’s a remarkable feat if you think about it. Unless you watched Bird Box and understand that the retarded mother fuckers like Ben and Candy don’t have to wear blind folds because they have have a built in immunity.

2. Tim Scott

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With President Obama now citizen Obama Tim Scott is the most powerful black man in America. By default he makes the list for being in such a powerful position as a United States Senator while being the weak pathetic bent back bitch ass that he’s been since being elected. As senator he’s rubber stamped every racist bill, judge and cabinet member that was put up for a vote. He’s a truly deplorable black man that will go down in history as one the most destructive to black people and progress in America with how he’s comported himself as Senator.

2a. Clarence Thomas

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Tim Scott rivals only Clarence Thomas when it comes to the race for the black person that could set black people and black progress back the furthest. Every day this human lawn jockey thinks of how he can throw a monkey wrench in the black come up. I know that we are not supposed to wish death on folks but come on my good Christian friends. He has a lifetime appointment. I need this nigga to die in order to live my beast negro life. #HurryUpAndDieYouVarmint

1. Koonye Kardashian West

Image result for kanye maga hat

Kanye was hip hop. Not the totality of the construct but a firm part of it and he has the receipts to prove it. And while the Donald Trump brand has had it’s fair share of mentions in hip hop (particularly before his foray into politics) he’s the antithesis of hip hop so even though on paper Mr Kardashian is a powerless peon, his Trumpian antics and mushroom dick riding have a deleterious affect on the culture. For that he can never be forgiven. Like Ben and Candy he don’t have to wear a blind fold because he’s already touched. But we not gonna excuse or write it off as mental illness his major transgressions. As black people and progeny of slaves still living in a world rife with white supremacy we all have truama running through our DNA. Some of us choose to embrace the plantation and in most instances the motivations are more selfish in nature than they are subconscious. Plantation Psychosis is what we would label what ails Kanye and there really is no cure. That’s precisely why he’s on the trading block for the next racial draft. 

Black Panther for Dummies: Decoding the seminal film of the 21st Cent

Before you accuse me of being hyperbolic for calling the Black Panther movie the seminal movie of the 21 first century understand that the 21st century is a mere 18 years old so it’s not like it was up against a great deal of competition. That said the title is a bit of an understatement because it’s actually the most seminal movie in the last 100 years (at least). Now you can feel free to lambaste me for being hyperbolic. But I implore you to hear me out first.

Art imitates life and vice versa. 50, 60 , 100 years ago a film like this could never have procured the financing because the guardians of Hollywood’s purse strings were well aware of how powerful media imagery is on the collective subconscious of a nation and how the collective subconscious of a nation being triggered has the power to create huge paradigm shifts in a relatively  short period of time. Ronald Reagan is the lord and savior of the conservative id to this day, not because of what he did as governor of California or president of the United States. Ronald Reagan earned his stripes as the god father of conservative ideology for what he did in Hollywood. Not as the D List actor that he was, but as the head of the screen actors guild. As guardian of American cinema he made sure that every movie that he had the power to green light was way more John Wayne than John Brown. If a movie promised optics that codified White patriarchal supremacy it was green lit and fully and very easily financed. If it had even a semblance of an opposite affect it was stopped in its tracks and those who were part of the failed project were essentially black listed and labeled communist sympathizers.

It’s hard to overstate the correlation between what comes on the silver screen and how the it affects the worldview of the masses.

Take for instance Birth of a Nation (The original 1915 movie). It was hailed as cinematic genius and in a way it was. Not because of a creative plot but because of how it helped stamp white patriarchal supremacy as the dominant theme of the 20th century American ethos. Even more indelible was the damsel in distress trope of white women at the hands of the scary black man. A trope that still holds a lot of weight in this day and age.

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As you can see media imagery and subliminal messaging are extremely effective and long lasting–much more than most consciously know or understand. If it were not so effective a 30 second super bowl commercial would not cost 5 million dollars and product placement in movies would not cost exponentially more (I can only imagine how much Lexus paid for their prominent feature in this movie).

For the sake of brevity I’m going to highlight just a few of the paradigm shifting subliminal and not so subliminal messages that were inherent in this movie that seems to have taken root in the collective unconscious of not just African-Americans writ large but Americans of all walks.

Today’s Mathmatics

Wakanda

Africa minus European Encroachment = Wakanda.  Diamonds + salt + gold + iron + cobalt +uranium + copper +bauxite + silver + petroleum + cocoa beans + platinum + phosphate + tropical fruits + zirconium + unlimited sunshine = Vibranium. While the nation of Wakanda is no doubt a mythical land, make no mistake about the fact that the wealth and resources boasted about it in the movie is very real and very tangible.  Africa is the home of humanity. The cradle of civilization that if it were unmolested by colonization and mass human trafficking as a continent it would be every bit as powerful, self sufficient and self sustaining as the fictitious nation of Wakanda. One of the most beautiful things about this movie is the fact that it has inspired regular run of the mill American Negroes, the type that would normally be averse or indifferent to the motherland, to be far more embracing of it and intellectually curious about it. Some of the same black folks that propagate half and barely truthful talking points like “Africans look down on black Americans” showed up in movies theaters in dashiki’s talking about “Wakanda for life”. Some see them as hypocrites. I see Ne-growth. More importantly I see what Marcus Garvey saw when he created the Black Star Line and his back to Africa movement. Not necessarily or solely in the physical form but back to Africa mentally. The village within the diaspora concept.

Paying homage to paying homage

Paying homage to ones ancestors is not uniquely African. At least not on a surface level. There’s all sorts of buildings, bridges and monuments erected in honor of the dead colonizers. However the African centered form of homage whereby calling on and leaning on the elders and ancestors for knowledge, strength and wisdom is indeed uniquely African. Ostensibly the deeper the roots and tradition the more knowledge, wisdom and strength that can be gleamed. Nothing illustrated that salient fact more than juxtaposing T’Challa’s trips through the ancestral plane with Killmonger’s trip. T’Challa during his first trip through the ancestral plane went in lacking the confidence of a king. Burdened with taking over the thrown from his father who was killed T’Challa needed reassurances that he was up for the job. T’Chaka reminded him that he prepared him for this day giving him all of the assurances that he needed and he came back to present day Wakanda with the requisite confidence to defend all challengers to the throne. During his second trip through the ancestral plane he had even more confidence. So much so that he challenged the wisdom of his father and the ancestors that preceded him for their failure to share the wealth, resources and technology with the rest of the African diaspora still under the firm grip of white supremacy. In that instance he was actually standing on the shoulders of his ancestors and seeing far past their highest visions. Conversely when Killmonger went through the ancestral plane he did not have a very deep path to draw from. His father who never made it to the elder stage of life was probably the same age as Killmonger was when he was killed so you essentially had a person who was arrested in his development seeking wisdom from someone who was equally suspended in a primordial state of being.  Since nothing plus nothing equals nothing Killmonger arises from the ancestral plane even more reckless than when he laid down.  The great take away from these two cousin’s trip down ancestral lane is that sins of the father revisit the son and the sins of an absent father revisit and oftentimes destroy their sons. Something that many of us know all too well.

Black Girl Magic Galore

wise women 3

What do the #Blacklivesmatter, #Metoo and #OscarSoWhite hashtags have in common? #Timesup here is your answer: They were all the brainchild of black women and they all sparked major movements that to this day are major disruptive forces that have to be reckoned with.

As we delve deeper in to the Aquarian age feminine energy across the globe will only get more powerful and more potent so it would behoove black men to get ahead of the curve and be like T’Challa when it comes to incorporating the wise council of the women around him. One of the things that made T’Challa a successful King in the movie was his willingness to accept and respect the wisdom of the women around him. They proved to have more foresight and loyalty than his right hand man and that is a lesson that black men in America would be wise to adopt and adapt.

wise women 2

If every black man had him a Shuri for a sister, a Nakia for a wife, an Okoye as consiliari and 5 star general and a Ramonda for a momma we’d be a formidable force in this world as a people. As a matter of fact many of us have Shuri’s, Nakia’s, Okoye’s and Ramonda’s in our lives, we are just failing to recognize them. Ask failed US Senate candidate and former judge and accused pedophile Roy Moore if black women are formidable foes. Word to the wise. Surround yourself with some of these Wakandan warrior women already in your orbit.

Nobody wins when the family feuds

family fued

One of the reoccurring and more heated debates that I’ve seen post premiere has been the T’Challa vs Killmonger debate with many strongly feeling that Killmonger was the real hero in this fictitious tale. People expect those that are commonly referred to as “Hoteps” (by 2019 I hope that we can retire that phrase as a pejorative) to be more team Killmonger than team T’Challa but it’s not just the Black Israelites expressing these sentiments. People of sound mind are also concluding that Killmonger was more protagonist than antagonist– something that I find heartening and a bit disheartening. It’s somewhat disheartening in a way because despite him shooting his formerly ride or die Wakandan like woman through the heart and almost choking out an elder Wakandan woman there’s obviously a lot of passes being given for sociopathic behavior. It’s heartening at the same time because the movie was obviously able to evoke the long dormant wholistic thought pattern that was once common place in the Afrocentric thought process. One of the major problems with the African-American mindset is how we have been conditioned to think and process stimuli in such a binary manner. So while you may cringe at some of the Killmonger was the next Malcolm X quips and comparisons that cross your social media timelines take solace in the fact that some of our people are simply enamored with the fact that revolutionary thoughts, reversing the plight of of the historically oppressed and calling out the progeny of colonizers is what moves them more than some of his untoward antics and actions. In other words contentiousness is trending and it’s hard to construe that as a bad thing. Moreover the rage and inexplicable anger and angst possessed by Killmonger is inherent in some form or fashion in most black men in America.

James Baldwin said it best when he mused ‘to be a negro in America and relatively conscious is to almost always be in a fit of rage’. That described Killmomger as much as it describes most black people in America hence his widespread resonance amongst so many people. The myriad conversations and debates about who should be the King of Wakanda is more cathartic than problematic because it grants us a chance to do some Self reflection about who we are as a people and what our rightful place in the world is. Most importantly it grants us the opportunity to see Africans in Africa, abroad and state side as our cousins, brothers, sisters elders etc who we are only disconnected from via the dastardly deeds of European colonization and chattel slavery. In fact the plight of the black family in America is a microcosm of what the plight of Africans in Africa are. We have common issues so it only makes common sense for a symbiotic and unbreakable bond be forged. With all that Vibranium flowing through the continent matched with all the intellectual property and ingenuity possessed by African-Americans it’s high time we set up trade routes and strategic partnerships that would be mutually benefit. The Chinese have made major inroads in Africa because of their monetary prowess. The United States and NATO is deep in the continent via Africom. Black people collectively don’t have the money that China has nor do we have the air craft carriers, surface to air missiles or anything near the stockpile of weapons of mass casualty possessed by Africom but what we do have is the blood royal bloodline-Wakanda for life right?

Top 10 Coons of 2017

2016 was a vintage year for cooning. It was such a vintage year in grand coonery that if cooning in 2016 was a bottle of champagne it would be a bottle of that 1992 Dom Perignon. The 2016 cooning was so abnormally ubiquitous that the usual top ten year ending coon list had to be expanded exponentially to a top 100.

The good news is the level of coonery has dropped back down to normal levels in 2017 and we are back to the top 10. The bad news is niggas are still cooning hard  which makes this list a necessity still. That said and with out further ado I present to you the top ten coons of 2017 and the last 10 people that you’d invite to the cookout or any other gathering of proud Negros in fellowship.

 

 

9 & 10 Diamond & Silk

Like their fearful leader and fellow wearer of bad hair pieces Donald John Trump, this unbearable unbeweaveable doltish duo traffic heavily in alternative facts. Their incoherent psycho babble even to the most loyal fucktrumpet white supremacist supporters of the American idiot in the Oval Office are nothing more than useful idiots (situational) to be called upon in those rare gatherings where wearing black face just won’t suffice to get said racist point/taunt/joke off.

Long story short this ratcharded duet sings one of the more innocuous coon tunes. They are the Mitchell & Ness of coonery. A throw back to the chitterling circuit and minstrel act days. They’re much more detrimental to the overall coon cause than they are to the culture because they represent the sum total of what being a coon is and that is to be a mascot for white supremacy. These two Nebraska Coonhuskers with all of the cooning that they’ve done in the Trump era  error have earned themselves at best the right to have their faces dawned on a football helmet as the mascot of Billy Bob and thems favorite football team. Their YouTube channel and legion of Alt-right followers on twitter is pretty much their zenith.

 

8. Pastor Mark Burns

What do you call a black evangelical Christian? Other than a fool, a tool and a coon nothing. Pastor Mark Burns who has become an annual mainstay on these coon lists makes another top ten finish for his rabidly coontastic support for Roy Moore in his failed Senate bid. Amid allegations of being a child predator and upon the revelation that Judge Moore felt that America was last great back when Mark Burns ancestors were slaves. Being the steadfast fellow that he is Pastor Burns did not let a little racism and sexual assault against minors deter him from hopping aboard the Roy Moore Pony express. Mr Burns much like Cubic Zirconia and Polyester are not the kind of coons that are dangerously deceptive whereby they are a threat to attract more black people into joining their chorus of support for overt white supremacy. They are barely able to carry out their primary role which is to assuage white guilt by providing cover for overt racism.  Their  hyperbolic proclamations and embarrassing antics makes it hard for anyone not already on the Trump or alt-right bandwagon to take them seriously. In many ways they serve as living breathing and incessantly blathering examples of what we within the culture bemoan about token Negroes and how and why they are granted platforms. If you’re  mediocre or less as a black person and you talk up white supremacy while talking down equality there’s a pretty good chance that you will land a job that will compensate you for far more than you’re worth.

#CooningForTheComeUp

7. Jason Whitlock

jason-whitlock-colin-kaepernick

Jason Whitlock is another perennial top ten coontender for sell out of the year. Just like Pastor Burns and the hoodpossum duo of Diamond & Silk he’s a talent-less twit who only has a national platform because he recklessly uses it to denigrate black people and all of the worthy causes that the black community holds dear. What makes his coonery far more egregious than coontestants 8, 9 and 10 is the fact that his platform is not only a national one but it affords him the right to assault the the truth daily. The truth about black lives matter, the truth about why players take a knee for the anthem and just about any truth that speaks to the reality faced by the poor, black, brown and disaffected. His employer Fox Sports I suspect know this is why they hired him. The good news is the fact that they also hired Shannon Sharpe and that’s who we can thank for the skit behind the picture above being shelved before going live. Our “friend” Jason Whitlock thought that it would be a good idea to poke fun at Colin Kapernick and movement that he sacrificed his NFL career to support. While it never saw the light of day the point conveyed in the picture was crystal clear.

6. Sheriff David Clarke

Former Milwaukee sheriff and current Fox News coontributer David Clarke while high on the list for cooning this year had a pretty down year as it pertains to reaping rewards for his constant coonery. After being a faithful surrogate on the chitterling circuit extolling the virtues of the most virtue-less human being on earth he was expected to be taking a cabinet position with the administration somewhere within Homeland Security. That job never materialized. Instead what followed him was a series of lawsuits and investigations. He’s being sued for the inordinate amount of deaths in his jail as Milwaukee sheriff and now being investigated by the FBI for abuse of power. The dip shit sheriff also thought that it would be prudent to have his deputies harass an airline passenger for having the audacity to shake his head at his cooning ways. This led the FBI early in 2017 to get a warrant to search his email. Fortunately its probably why he did not get hired to work for the federal government and unfortunately for him why he did not rise higher on the top coon of the year list from 2016 to 2017. The good ole sheriff may soon see his usefulness expire.

5. Ray Lewis

Ray Lewis 2 knee salute

Ray Rat is another two time top ten finisher. He actually finished number 2 last year out of 100 coontestants so finishing 5th this year among only 10 coontestants is kind of an improvement. Ray only had one certified major coon moment this year. After lambasting Colin Kapernick and his taking a knee during the anthem all last year Ray found himself at the cross roads of the culture that spawned his legend and the cross hairs of white fragility when he was forced to make a decision to take a knee or stand for the anthem. As fate would have it he was scheduled to be an honorary captain of his former Baltimore Ravens team for their overseas game in London the very same week that his president Donald Jerk Trump fired a salvo at the entire NFL by calling the protesting players sons of bitches while imploring their teams owners to fire them.  Needless to say players around the league were more emboldened and defiant this particular week and players from both sides were demonstrative in their response to the presidents taunts. This left Ray with one of two choices. Stand for the anthem or take a knee. Never one to be confined by binary decision making the quick thinking former all pro linebacker took two knees leaving him with the predictable excuse that he was praying and not protesting. His lame excuse however did not inoculate him from the hail storm of salty white tears. In fact the very same white folks that offered him effusive and endless praise a year ago at this time for being a black face opposing social justice and equality managed to have a petition waged against him to have his statue removed from the Ravens stadium.

4. Malcom Jenkins

Now standing on the sidelines holding up a right fist 👊🏿 (the universal sign of black power and struggle in America) while the rest of the 50 thousand or so in the stadium are wittingly and unwittingly paying homage to chattel slavery and American aggression with hands on heart singing an ode written by slave owning Francis Scott Key is hardly something to label one with such a dubious distinction. However when that one player who hoisted a black power fist during the anthem co-opts a movement and starts to secretly negotiate on behalf of players taking knees during the anthem with demonstratively more skin in the game questioning the integrity of said dude is apropos. Even more damning is the devil within the details of the deal that this single player struck with NFL ownership to bring an end to NFL player protests of the National Anthem. To make a long story short. An NFL player that has never taken a knee during the anthem negotiated a deal with the NFL’s owners to bring an end to players taking a knee. And that’s not even the kicker. The kicker is that the almost 100 million pledged by ownership over a period of almost 10 years will only be granted if the players come up with half of the money. And oh yeah the money that ownership forks over will be deducted from funds earmarked for other worthy charitable giving like breast cancer and domestic violence.

Word to the wise. Never trust a nigga named Jenkins. He’s gonna do some Real Jenky shit on you 100 percent of the time.

3. Parris DenardParris4 Donald Trump has had a pretty tumultuous first year in office replete with all kinds of self inflicted foul ups, bleeps and blunders. He’s been criticized from all corners of the political spectrum for them. Almost all corners that is. Donald Trump is to Parris Dennard what Ms Jenkins was to Bonita Bitrell. He ain’t one to gossip but…

Bonita

…Don’t nobody better say nothing bad about Ms. Jenkins  Donald Trump in front of the boy Parris. He goes hard in the paint for Trump. Harder than anyone else on television. To the point that he’s become an easy and favorite target of CNN anti-Trump pundits. He’s taken some brutal beat downs on CNN panels in the last 12 months but remains steadfast as a stalwart defender of all things Trump.

He clearly wants that number one coon spot and though he may have come up short in 2017. He is in pole position for the number one coon spot in the future.

2. Ben CarsonCarson-Green Uncle Ben is another annual attendee at the Coon award show. He’s cracked the top 5 for at least the last 3 years in a row. He gets the number 2 spot for 2017. With the departure of Niggarosa Manigault Dr. Carson remains the lone black face in the whitest presidential cabinet since Reconstruction. As the head of HUD Carson was made to appear on capitol hill to explain away the draconian cuts being made to agency. Carson had little grasp of the cuts or the intended and unintended consequences of them and how it would affect the people that vitally depend on it as a resource. His cringe worthy performance while being queried by Congressman Al Green will live in infamy and again serves as yet another reminder of the kind of ineptitude that even your most accomplished coons are equipped with. White privilege has nothing in coon privilege. Absolutely nothing.

1. Tim Scott

Token Tim

Token Timmy while under the radar in so far as embarrassing coon antics and overt expressions of love for master has been playing a major role in codifying the white supremacist gripe on America. He voted affirmatively to confirm Jeff Sessions as attorney general and Betsy Devose as Secretary of education two people whose policies directly impact in the most negative ways black people. He also voted to confirm the myriad unqualified hacks that will infect and infuse more top down racism in the judicial system for generations to come. He’s easily the most powerful black man in America next to Clarence Thomas and he’s arguably done as much damage to the future of black America in 2017 than Clarence Thomas has done over the last 25 years sitting on the Supreme Court.

Most recently he voted along with his white supremacist caucus in he senate to reform the tax code shifting even more of the burden to keep this nation afloat on the poor and middle class. At the all white white house day party celebration he was positioned up front as Dystopian Donald’s favorite African-American. If a silver-lining exists hopefully it will be that such an optic will finally illustrate to white Americans writ-large that coons are as detrimental to them and their future success as they have been to the black community. Not holding my breath but that is my hope.

 

Honorable Mention: 

vibe-omarosa-fired-compressed
After coming in number one in 2016 Niggarosa Parks fell all the way off the list. To her credit and like she did her white house job sh went away kicking and screaming so don’t get it confused. She’s still a coon for life.

 

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Herschel Walker as fullback for the New Jersey Generals of the USFL was once property of Donald Trump. Someone needs to get the memo to him that the USFL is now defunct and he’s no longer property of Donald. He seems not to be aware.

tina-campbell-open-letter-donald-trump-1485699261-640x426
After voting for and vocally supporting Donald Trump in 2016 the bad half of the Mary Mary tandem doubled down in 2017 for her support. She’s officially gone for good. Do not try to resuscitate.

Shout out to team Uncoon:

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Don Lemon prior to 2016 was a fixture on the year ending coon list. I’m happy to report that his black card has been fully reinstated with no probationary period. Welcome back to black Don. Don’t fuck this up.

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While the black delegation is still mulling it it appears that Charles Barkley who ironically made the top 100 list in 2016, will have his card reinstated. He will likely be on probation for at least the first quarter if 2018. 

The Las Vegas Tragedy And Why Redress of the 2nd Amendment is Not the Answer

 

As always the case when mass shootings occur people want to redress the 2nd amendment in the most reactionary manner. In most cases citing failed proposed laws that even if enacted would have done little to stop said massacre.
One of the more truthful idioms born from the mind of idiots is the  “guns don’t kill people, people kill people” mantra.  Does is it make sense for America to have more sensible gun laws like the rest of the developed world? Of course it does but with a congress and president scared shitless of the NRA and gun lobby its a pipe dream to think that this tragedy or any of the previous ones will spur them to action. I mean if a classrooms full of 5 and 6 year olds being mowed down by an AR-15 did not motivate them to enact safer and more sensible gun laws it’s safe to assume that nothing will. 


Furthermore the kinds of reforms that gun control proponents push, for the most part if enacted will not put a dent in the over 500 gun related deaths and maimings that take place in America on a daily basis. Banning assault assault styled riffles and 100 round clips will not save Pookie from Ray Ray’s .40 caliber pistol for shorting him on a bag weed. Nor will it save little Johnny from shooting his little sister Sarah in the stomach after he finds big Johnny’s loaded 9mm in his night stand while Becky-Sue is distracted with her soap operas and smart phone when she’s supposed to be watching her kids. The lion share of deaths by gun in America, be they intentional murder or unfortunate mishaps due to reckless handling or storage of weapons are unpreventable via legislation. Are AR-15’s, AK-47’s and other assault style weapons necessary for citizens to have? Absolutely not. However the toothpaste is already out of the tube and there’s no realistic chance of putting it back so my advice to the proponents of gun control would be to recalibrate their mission starting with their message.

 If conservatives are good at one thing that their more liberal counterparts would be well served at mimicking is the manner in which they brand their ideals and end goals. They apply the most innocuous names for their most insidious deeds while reserving their harshest labels for some of the more sensible goals of their opponents. For instance calling a reasonable  tax on the transfer of wealth from the 1 percent to their born on home plate progeny a death tax in the minds of most Americans gives them an automatic leg up in the argument. Even among those that are in the 99th percentile of the 99 percent. Calling the Affordable Care Act Obamacare no matter how much more useful it is than their proposed Orangecare is an automatic win in middle America and other unsavory places in the US where the deplorable vote holds sway. You don’t need a reminder of the fact that in certain places in America they’re just not into 44. The point I’m making here is that if the proponents of gun control wish to move the needle in the direction of more sensible gun laws they need to start  from scratch starting with scraping what they call what they’re trying to do.  No body likes to be controlled so the entire “gun control” label needs to be thrown out the window. Take a page from the conservative playbook and call it “gun freedom” or some other friendly name. In this new gun Freedom bill that they propose they need to put some meat in it. Most preventable  gun deaths in America are not done by the mentally ill using an assault style rifle with a banana clip so making those things the hallmark of your leguslative goals in the long and short run is a waste of time and energy.  Most gun deaths in America from my purview are the result of gun runners that buy firearms in bulk in one of the 48 contiguous states where the laws are lax and are transported to the hood where they are disseminated with zero oversight and fall into the hands of people with even less accountability for the express purpose of murder.  If the Gun Death Prevention Bill (see what I did there)  proposed made these gun runners and straw purchasers the boogie men as opposed to the gun enthusiasts who at least on the surface are legally and lawfully using these needless weapons you have a much more reasonate and air tight message. Another sensible legislative goal would be to have these weapons ballistic tested before they leave the factory and made as synonymous with the gun as a Carfax report is with a vehicle. In the groove of every gun barrel (save for shotguns) is a very unique pattern that’s akin to a finger print. If every gun that’s purchased has its ballistics recorded before its sold then in theory the owner of said gun will be much more judicious in how and where he lets it pop off. Not to mention it would make crime solving much more easier for authorities to solve. More importantly it will more easily pin point who these straw purchasers of firearms are and who their sources are. This of course would still be met with much consternation by the NRA and their conservative lackeys in congress but the messaging would be one in which they could not easily parlay into an assault on the second amendment rights of blue blooded Americans in red state America. 

Somewhere along the line long ago the 2nd amendment rights of Americans have morphed into the right of gun manufacturers to maximize their profits by any and all means. To think that that’s going to change because 58 people were killed is to fundamentally not understand how America works. 

Since the 2nd amendment argument is so muddled and such a non-starter for so many in America the better battle would be the 1st amendment argument. Especially since many on the right are so willing to have that battle today. 


Fox News has been radicalizing white American terrorists since 1996. The Am side of your radio has been doing it much longer. The scientific name for “fake news” is propaganda. While the “fake news” coinage is relatively new it’s been used as a weapon in information warfare well before the B.C era. From Constantine the Great on through the Crusades and the Protestant reformation up to today’s alternative fact driven administration, propaganda has been the most potent tool in controlling the minds of the masses. Fake news was once so threatening to democracy in America that the powers that be saw fit to create laws to abate its powerfully specious affects. During the early 1900’s when the radio was the primary medium of mass communication the FDR administration created the FCC to regulate its airwaves. The MAYFLOWER DOCTRINE was created by the body soon after due to the inordinate powers wielded by corporations to sway public opinion for their private benefit. In short the doctrine mandated that equal time be given on all sides of issues germane to the public when discussed on air. The FCC knew then what far too many fail to grasp today and that’s the fact that the public broadcasters are duty bound to the public. Their position as gatekeepers of mass information is powerful tool that if used the wrong way or fell into the control of those with nefarious intentions could lead to calamity.

Fast forward to today and we are seeing great calamities in our news cycle on a daily basis. Some via natural disaster and many more that are man made (even the natural ones). Since there’s little to no chance of the Fairness Doctrine coming back the only true way to abate the perilous false premises that power fake news in this information warfare being waged against the American public is having a populous that’s far more awoke, in tune and analytic. Fake, false or misleading news is what left America with the choice of Hillary Clinton, Jill Stein and Donald Trump. Fake news is also largely responsible for why the worst of those three very bad choices won out. Now that fake news elevated a fake president to the Oval Office he’s trying his best to make it a permanent fixture in America. How do we stop him? I don’t have an answer to that. Hopefully like every thing else he’s attempted in the last 9 months he will fail due to his own gross incompetence or the gross incompetence of his party. If however he succeeds its incumbent upon we the people (of sound mind and good conscience) to know what’s real and relevant news and what’s meant to distract and even worse radicalize the malleable minds among us to commit the kinds of heinous acts that Mr. Stephen Paddock commited in Vegas. It’s easy to blame the suspect and write him off as some lone wolf or a mentally ill person but the truth is whether or not he acted in concert with another person he has a co-conspirator and that co-conspirator is embedded in the mainstream news. He’s not the first white man to use his entitlement, privilege and sense of superiority to make the public space his own personal killing ground for reasons only known to him and sadly he won’t be the last.  And no amount of gun control legislation can change that. While no manifesto was left detailing his political proclivities or social leanings his actions are in line with the myriad other men who were more transparent about theirs and for the most part their ethos and worldview was shaped by an amalgamation of cherry picked facts, half truths and outright falsehoods. 

People of good conscience must begin to put in silos all purveyors of fake and misleading news. Know what the history and political and social leanings are of all of the news sources you take in. If you don’t know the history of the author you really don’t know what you’re reading, watching and listening to. The survival of this great nation literally depends on The collective public to stay woke and while we are in this existential battle of amending amendments we should be doing it in numerical order. Once we get this whole Freedom of speech and the freedom of the press under control then I think as a nation we’d be better equipped and prepared to take on the Freedom to arm oneself to the tee. 

Destination Uncle Tom’s Cabin: Top 100 Coons of 2016 part two of two (49-1)

As bad as cast of characters were in act one, their black cards don’t necessarily need to be revoked–at least not permanently. Act two though? These 50 coons for the most part are coons that black people need to collectively shun for good barring a 180 degree about face from whatever the infraction(s) was that landed them in such dubious company.

Coontestant# 49 Cam Newton

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Based on his offense to blackness  in 2016 Cam actually belongs in the first group of redeemable coons. Cam is setting off the coon for life team via extrapolation. In 2015 Cam embraced being a strong and proudblack man, much to the chagrin of the Carolina fan base and of course team ownership. So what did they do? They decided to bring in GOP spin doctor and race bait extraordinaire Frank Luntz to be the quarterbacks coach on navigating conversations on social issues and race, and boy was Cam a quick study.

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At the rate of change that Luntz’s tutelage had on Cam, if he remains the QB’s race coach for much longer Cam will indeed become the second coming of Sammy Sosa–and much closer to the number one spot in the next year. Here’s hoping that Cam listens to more sounds of blackness in 2017 and less Frank Luntz.

#uncoonthyselfcam

Coontestants 48-46 Alicia D White, Caesar R Goodson and William Porter

While these three coons did not directly kill Freddie Gray, they grossly abdicated their civic responsibilities, their blackness and their sheer humanity to protect the blue shield. They were charged along with the three white officers who were actually the ones that mortally wounded Gray in an attempt to get to the truth. In the end the the well intended  tactic failed. Largely because of these three coward ass coons.

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With the cooperation of the aforementioned three coons, all of the charges stemming from Freddie Gray’s murder were dropped on all six suspects.

#blackcooopblackcopblackcopblackcop

 

Coontestant# 45 Baltimore Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake

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After prosecutor Marilyn Mosby took the courageous and unprecedented step of casting a wide net to prosecute the murder of a citizen  by the police her mayor threw her under the bus by claiming that she (Mosby) was bowing to political pressure as opposed to trying to solve a murder perpetrated by the state. She also insinuated that Mosby was not ready for the big stage, and when her city cops instigated a  “riot”, instead of empathizing with the young black youth that were being antagonized by her city police officers she publicly called the kids thugs.  Rawlings-Blake was and remains solidly on the side of the Baltimore Police Department despite the fact that the Justice department revealed systemic abuses. She is yet another black face put in a high place to protect white supremacy and maintain the status quo.

#olemammyassmammy

Coontestants #44-39 (washed up former athletes for Trump)  Mike Tyson, Latrell Sprewell, Terrell Owens  Shawn Merriman and Floyd Mayweather

It greatly pains me to put a former main man (Mike Tyson) on this list, but gotta go gotta go. When your allegiance to a purveyor of such overt bigotry and racism is stronger than your allegiance to your people you have out lived your worth to the community.

 

#allfuckboysquad

Coontestant# 38 Katrina Pierson

katrina-pierson

This bubble headed broad was Donald Chrumps national spokeswoman during  his campaign and as ridiculous and juvenile as his little twitter fingers are, hers were worse. So much so that she did not even get a White House job after all the cooning that she did to help get him elected. She’s made more appearances on milk cartons in the mid-west than she has on cable news since Trump was elected.

#whereswaldo

 

Coontestant# 37 Malik Obama

malikobama-gross

This coon from another continent and half brother of President Barack Obama was hired by Donald Chrump to be a prop at his last debate verse Hillary Clinton. He pulled off the trifecta with that coon move. He sold out African-Americans, his family name and the entire continent of Africa.

#dreamsofmyhalfwithalfbrother

 

Coontestamt#36 Armstrong Williams 

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Armstrong Williams has been cooning since before Tookie Williams was banging. This OG coon has been pushing the white supremacist agenda for so long that I almost for got that he rode the coon train. The television host, business partner and bff of Dr. Ben Carson had an up and down year himself. While his media empire continues to grow and he remains one of the most successful black men in media ownership his penchant for sexually harassing males continue to haunt him…

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Excerpts from the Washington Post

I wonder what his bff Ben Carson who is anti-gay to the extreme feels about his homies predisposition for getting butt massages by men.

#liketwohangersinacloset

 

 

Coontestant#35 Stacy Dash

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Stacy Dash aside from being a certified coon for life is a glutton for punishment and addicted to the game of rotisserie roast-me on twitter. She started 2016 out on the wrong foot by decrying the inherent racism of the Image Awards, BET and even going so far as to say that Black History month needed to be abolished. Her timing was impeccable because a week after she made the comments the NAACP image awards came and she was roasted by host Anthony Anderson who said

 “Everybody give a round of applause for Stacey Dash…What the hell is she doing here? Doesn’t she know that the Fox network is using her? She’s just an Ann Coulter dipped in butterscotch. That’s all she is. Baby, don’t let them use you! …Come back to the black people and get back to work on some of those beautiful C-movies that you used to do!” ~ Anthony Anderson

 And of course Black Twitter had to get a piece of the action

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BET was among the  first of many in the Twiterverse to clap back

 While Twitter had a ball with her coonified faux pas in 2016 unfortunately there will be less opportunities to lampoon her lunacy because Fox News declined to extend her contract for 2017. All that cooning she did and still got dropped. I wonder if BET is hiring???
#biggestloser
Coontestants 34-25 Allen West, Jesse Lee Patterson , Herman Cain, Larry Elder, Niger Innis, Raven Symone, Pastor David Manning , Charles Payne and Bob Johnson
 These ten consummate coons did not do or say anything of note in 2016. At least nothing more noteworthy than what we have all come to expect from them but what’s a coon list without adding them. The marvel is the fact that none of these handkerchief heads cracked the top 10 or even 20 this year.
#tradethemallforacartonofnewports
Coontestant #24 Lesean “Shady” McCoy 

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If he needs help, he’ll call the cops ~ Shady  McCoy on Colin Kapernicks protest

#suckerniggashit

 

 

Coontestant#23 Steve Perry

For most of this dudes career in public life and as a “school reformer” he’s flown far under the radar coondar. It makes him one of the more dangerous coons in America, specifically because his end goal is the destruction of the public school system and the teaching profession-particularly those in black communities. One of the few silver linings in Donald Chrump becoming the president is the fact that the insidious and dastardly deeds as they pertain to his work with school reform overtly dovetails with the plans that the new president has for inner city schools and he is rightly starting to be called out for it and it’s getting harder and harder for him to conceal his true motives.

 #teamvulture
Coontestant# 22 Lee Daniels

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“I wanted white people to feel good about being white people because right now, there’s a lot of hatred going on.”~ Lee Daniels

This dude has been speaking reckless for sometime now. His quizzical reasoning for why he cast a white star is as befuddling as it is bemusing.

#empireisgarbagewhywouldiwanttoseeabeckyversionofthattrash

 

 

Coontestant# 21 Tim Scott

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We would be remiss not to add this guy to the list. With Obama leaving office and Justice he’s the most powerful black man in the nation. And with those powers he votes lock step with the avowed racists in the US senate. From repealing voter rights and protections to removing the social safety net for the most needy this dude is as “ain’t shit” as they come.

 

#thespookatthesenatedoor

 

 

Coontestants# 20-19 Diamond & Silk

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This is what happens when rats and raccoons crossbred. These two Ratcoons better known as Diamond and Silk are the human equivalent of a Fox News merger with BET. If Azelia Banks and Carlton Banks ever had twins Diamond & Silk is who they’d grow up to be like. These hood possums are a viral minstrel show and are unabashed about it.
 #lacefrontlosers
Coontestant# 18 Jason Whitlock
 jason-whitlock
 Jason Whitlock is another long time coon who has a fairly broad media perch for which he uses to spread his cooned out opines.
Jason Whitlock on Black lives matter:African-Americans are more likely to be struck by lightning than to be killed by police
Jason Whitlock on Colin Kapernicks protest: “This kid was about Instagram models, tattoos, his abs and building up the Colin Kaepernick brand — until the very moment he loses his starting quarterback job, and now he’s out here and he’s ‘Martin Luther Cornrow.’ And he’s got cornrows, he’s Allen Iverson, he’s Angela Davis. I don’t buy it
 It’s rather obvious that he hates the black skin that he was born in. It’s unfortunate that he is given such a wide ranging perch on television, radio and print media to misinform the masses while codifying the white supremacist construct.
#willcoonforburgers
Coontestant#17  Justice Clarence Thomas
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Now that Justice Scalaia is dancing with the devil until the end of eternity  and unable to stick his hand up this clowns ass to play puppet master, he’s a rudderless coon on the bench less able to fuck over the country and black people by extension. He still however is one of the most destructive coons to black progression of all time so  his falling out of the top ten has much less to do with him doing less cooning in 2016 and much more to do with the the uptick in competition coonpetition for that number one spot.

#kingofcoons
Coontestant#16 Kanye West
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 Kanye has been on a collision course with coonery for a while now. And while his fragile mental state is cause for more empathy and understanding than scorn and rebuke we’ed be remiss to omit him from making the top 20 list for 2016. With love of course.
#comebackhomeyezzy
Coontestant# 15 Officer Brentley Vinsonofficer-brentley-vinson
 The man on the left is Keith Lamont Scott. Someone who was minding his business reading a book in his car while waiting to pick his kid up from school. The coon on the right is Brently Vinson, the Charlotte officer that murdered him for no reason at all. And while I do think that it’s possible a black man joinging a racist police force such as Charlotte could lead to him becoming a coon, something tells me that Vinson was a coon long before he received his badge. He’s a graduate of Liberty University. What Black man goes there that is not already a coon?
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Coontestant# 14 Sgt.  Demetrick Pennie
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 This coon with a badge just wanted to make his name known as a proud member of the Procyon species of mammal. Why else would he bring forth such a frivolous suit? This is what you call “how to get on Fox news 101”. i should not even be giving him the attention but how can he not make this list? This coon is being used as a pawn in a law suit not only naming Black Lives Matter, but also President Obama, Hillary Clinton, and Al Sharpton. This coon is literally throwing his feces at the wall with hopes that is sticks.
#monkeycoonpigandratallrolledinone
Coontestant# 13 Howard Croft
howard-croft
 Howard Croft served as the City of Flints director of public works from 2011  until he was forced to resign in 2015. His position oversaw the flint water distribution system. It was him that brought the recommended changes that had the then city emergency manager Ed Kurtz switch the cities water source to the Flint River. He along with Kurtz has been indicted and is facing up to 20 years. Luckily he has the face of a snitch and all indications are he is doing just that as his previous counsel dropped him for meeting with investigators alone and rumors that the governor Rick Snyder too will soon face indictment. Stay tuned…
 #nevertrustaniggathathasapartonthesideofhishead
Coontestant #12 Darnell Earley
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 Darnell Earley is one of the emergency managers that the governor hand picked to run many of the cities in the state of Michigan. Even before the Flint water crisis that he helped cultivate and cover up he was a certified coon because he was used as a tool to usurp the sovereignty and franchise of the black people of the cities that he was appointed. He basically helped render their votes impotent because no matter who the citizens of Benton Harbor, Flint or Detroit elected, he and the other emergency managers were placed in charge of their city. He eventually replaced Ed Kurtz as city manager of Flint during their ill-fated switch to the Flint river for the cities water supply. Despite knowing that poisons from that river was literally making the citizens of the city sick to death. He too is facing indictment. He even had the audacity to try and stick the cash strapped city of Flint with the bill for his $750 per hour lawyer.
#heneedstobewaterboardedwithflintwater
Coontestant#11 Pastor Mark Burns
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 This extra mediocre fuck boy is your typical witless and talent-less tool. A coon of his stature normally would not make it so close to the top 10 even in a non-vintage year. He makes it this high on the list for the sheer audaciousness of his cooning ways. After cooning his way into a speaking gig at the GOP convention it all came crashing down when his bio was discovered to have been replete with alternative facts. He stated that he was a member of Kappa Alpha Psi fraternity that was a lie, he said that he was in the Army reserve, and that too was proven to be untrue. His being enrolled in a masters of divinity program also was a figment of his imagination. He was confronted with all of these stretches of the truth on camera in a sit down interview with CNN. It was so bad for the coon that he tried to go off the record mid interview and when that did not work homeboy walked out of the interview leaving the CNN correspondent all by his lonesome in his 400 square foot church. In the end Massa Trump took him off the coon circuit and his ass ain’t been seen since.
#outcoonedhimself

 

Top 10 coons of 2016

 

Coontestant# 10 Pastor Darryl Scottdarrell-scott-donald-trump-r
 Pastor Darryl Scott is the lead vocalist in the Black Preachers for Trump crew.
black preachers for trump
In fact Darryl Scott is the Michael to Pastor Burns Tito in so far as what they mean to the BPFT movement.
preachers-for-trumpo

So far he has not been able to parlay his pulpit cooning into a steady job with the administration so for now he has to settle for being the right hand coon to Donald’s right hand coon.

 

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Coontestant# 9 Lil Wayne
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 Wayne actually looks like the physical manifestation of a rat and raccoon encounter during mating season. His music has long been of the minstrel type. However as demeaning and degrading as his music has been over the last couple of decades he managed to make occasional  dalliances with the reality faced by many of his fans that made him the mega rap star that he is. That’s why is answers to some very basic questions into his level of black consciousness left so many bemused.
Lil Wayne on Colin Kapernicks protest:
“I’m not into it enough to even give an opinion. Somebody had to tell me why he was doing it. That’s how much I didn’t know what was going on, and I kinda still don’t. Somebody gotta explain to me like, ‘Yo, he kneeling because of Black Lives Matter thing and because’—that whole wave just went by me too fast for me to give an opinion.”
 Lil Wayne on racism:
“These 33 years have been nothing but a blessing,” Wayne said on the show. “I have never—never’s a strong word. I have never, never dealt with racism and I’m glad I didn’t have to.” Tunechi added that he didn’t know if being a star made him immune to racism, but he now knows racism does exist despite racism not being his reality, continuing, “I would have to say I thought it was over. I still believe it’s over, but, obviously it isn’t.”
Lil Wayne after black twitter got wind of his coonery:
lil-wayne
#boycotthisbullshitmusic
Coontestant# 8 Jim Brown
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 Jim’s late breaking 2016 coonery caught a lot of people by surprise but I can’t say that I am one of those folks. Jim has a reputation for being down for the historic causes on behalf of the black community but the truth us Jim has always been out for Jim.
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This famous photo of Jim Brown and other great black athletes in their prime years during the 1960’s showing their unconditional and public support is something of an urban legend. Jim Brown is rightly credited with putting the group together, but the stated goal of this meeting of the minds has been obfuscated over the years. This meeting of hall of fame minds was the brainchild of boxing promoter Bob Arum. He tasked Jim Brown with gathering the group to convince Muhammad Ali to enlist in the Army so that his ban from boxing would be rescinded and they could all profit from the burgeoning closed circuit pay per view industry.   It just so happened that Ali was game enough for all of them and would not hear any of it. In the end these “well meaning” gentlemen & Jim settled for this iconic photo op.
jim-and-o
 Which brings us to his most recent photo op in the tale end of 2016. The one where Trump and his loyal brown minions sent him on the now familiar walk of shame through the Trump Towers lobby to deliver this barf inducing quip:
“I fell in love with him because he really talks about helping African-American, black people and that’s why I’m here” ~~ Jim Brown on Donald Trump
#fuckjimbrowntoo
# 7 Don King
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 About the only mantra more annoying than Don Kings “Only in America” chant is Don Trumps “Make America great again” so the natural synergy between the two Dons should surprise no one. What I did find just a little bit surprising is the level of minstrel that Mr.King stooped to while introducing him:
“You’ve got to understand, my black brothers and sisters, they told me, ‘You’ve got to try to emulate and imitate the white man and then you can be successful… So we tried that. They said, ‘If you can get some money, you can do this here.’ I told Michael Jackson, I said if you’re poor, you’re a poor negro – I would use the N-word – but if you’re a rich, you’re a rich negro; if you are intelligent, you’re an intellectual negro; if you’re a dancing and sliding and gliding nigger – I mean negro – you’re a dancing and sliding and gliding negro. So dare not alienate because you cannot assimilate. You know, you’re going to be a negro till you die.”
 #onlyinameriKKKa
Coontestant #6 Sherrif David Clarke
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Milwaukee sheriff David Clarke is one black man that has never met a shooting of an unarmed black man by a law enforcement officer that he did agree with. David Duke has more genuine love for black people than this afro goatee having nincompoop. In addition to being one of Fox News most prized props for misinformation he oversees as sheriff one of the deadliest jails in the country and for that he has legislators in his state asking that he be removed.

 

#hanghimbythechin

Coontestant# 5 Shaqcoon O’Neal
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 Shaq shot up the coon charts in 2016. His penchant for always paying homage to the police and being an honorary sheriff has always been a turn off but not enough to place him so high on the coon list or even on it at all. That was of course until her decided it prudent to give his incoherent and coonish opine on Colin Kapernick’s anthem protest on Fox & Friends of all places…
 “To each his own…I don’t really have a say on it, but I would never do that. My father was a military man, and you know, he protected this country. Uncles are in law enforcement, you know, they go out and work hard every day..People like Muhammad Ali and Bill Russell, they were one way their whole career. You can’t show us something, and then go to another just because of certain issues”~ Shaq
 Nigga what?!?!
What makes Shaq’s commentary so egregiously coonish is the fact that he’s part of the .001 percent of Black Americans. Unlike most of the coons that routinley grind our gears he’s far from being a mediocre negro. He literally hit the DNA lottery with his god given physique. He has zero reasons to be cooning and even less reasons to be sitting on the couch with the lame cast of Fox & Friends giving an opine on issues that require depth of understanding and nuanced thought. Big duffus has a PHD yet he let three stoogers from Fox News walk him into talking himself out of his black card.
#thebigcoon
Coontestant#4 Charles Barkley
charles-barkley
 Shaq’s partner in coon has much more experience in the area of catering to the angst ridden ego of white males so his offenses to black people and black culture is far less shocking. For him to out rank so many other certified coons he would however have to coon harder than he did in years past. Never one to back down from a challenge Barkley with the help of TNT put on a classical coon performance.
TNT has a 6 part series airing early in 2017 titled “The Race Card” which is a discussion around the hot-button issues that cause and comprise the strained racial relations in today’s America and they tapped Charles Barkley of all people to host the program. They might as well have named it “TNT Trolls Black America” because that is essentially what happened on the first stop of Coon conductor Charles. The first stop was in Baltimore Maryland and it came on the heels of a justice department report that highlighted systemic abuses of the residents of Baltimore at the hands of Baltimore City police. Charles however did not want to talk about that. He instead chastised the audience for not expressing condolences for 4 officers that were killed earlier in the week in other parts of the country. Needless to say that did not go very well. He ended up having  to be ushered out by security because they were big mad.
#chuckcoon
Coontestant # 3 Ben Carson
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 Dr. Ben Carson is the only coon on the Trump train that was able to engineer for himself a a cabinet position. Being a renowned brain surgeon one would think that naturally he’s be tapped to be the surgeon general. Not in Trumps White House. Carson was instead tapped to head up the department of housing and urban development, something he has next to no clue about. Other than the fact that he’s black and hails from the inner city he is qualified to run HUD in Trumpian thought. Why? Because when they gut the agency render it totally useless they will be able to point to their black token as the cause to shield them from claims of racism.
#coondoctor
Coontestant# 2 Ray Lewis
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 17 years ago Ray Lewis while partying at the Super Bowl in Atlanta with his boys got into some sort of conflict with two men who were both subsequently stabbed to death. Both of the victims blood made it’s way into Ray’s limo and the all white suit that his bama ass was wearing on that cold January day vanished from the face of the earth. Now I’m not calling Ray Lewis and murderer but that is what he was charged with and there was far more evidence linking him to the murders of Jacinth Baker and Richard Lollar than there was evidence linking OJ Simpson to the murders of Ron Goldman and Nicole Brown. Despite the damning evidence and in the case of his Easter Sunday suit the lack there of Ray was acquitted of all charges. By the court or law and by the court of ubiquitous negro opinion. To most of white America however he was still a thug unworthy of playing in the NFL. So he went from Ray Lewis the typical bad boy from the University of Miami to Creflo Dollar Jr with the extra preachy super annoying disposition. Yet and still most from the Negro delegation even still.  That obviously did not ingratiate himself enough with white America because in more recent years he’s incorporated some serious respectability negro politics into his spiel.
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  He started with making a bunch of lame videos appealing to the youth of Baltimore to behave and not riot in the face of police abuse then slowly but surely went full blown coon on us with several appearances on The Undisputed  hosted by fellow coon Jason Whitlock where they formed the greatest black tag team duo since Rocky Johnson and Tony Atlas manned the squared circle. The Colin Kapernick story gave this tag team duo all kinds of coon life but that was just a warm up for Ray Ray. He too took the infamous walk of shame photo op at Trump Towers. But unlike Kanye, Jim Brown and Steve Harvey Ray looked like he was quite conformable in that setting.
 #rayraythemurdererliarandcoon
 Coon of the Year: Omarosa
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 This she devil right here is the most dangerous and despicable black woman in America–the world even.  She’s Kelly-Ann Conway with melanin and a functioning brain. She’s #blackgirlrocks minus a conscious.
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This cold calculating shrew is Donald Trumps bottom bitch and director of  African-American coon outreach for his administration. She’s the cunning concubine of the slave master… .
Ernistine.jpeg
 …but don’t mistake her for Ernestine.
 She’s much closer to the type of concubine that you’d find on the Candy land Plantation. You know the type that can’t live without master.
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 The truly unfortunate thing about her is the fact that she is smart, highly ambitious and talented. She knows more than the average coon and even more than the man that pays her a hansom  ransom to corral and create more coons. She’s gonna make coons out of a lot of men these next four years. I pray that in the next few years she does not morph into some sort of role model for the young black, melaninated  and impressionable young girls coming up. It’s bad enough that we have an avalanche of black men bending over backwards and forwards to appease the white male supremacist ethos that infects America. The last thing we need is a role model for young black girls to think it prudent to do the same. So while there’s no denying her drive and black girl magic, the fact that she uses her powers for evil purposes we’re going to have to shelve celebrating her achievements during the month of February.
#wedontneedanothercondi